God is Really Difficult

I have been taking a break from blogging over the last couple months or so. I really enjoy blogging (it works like therapy for me), but I have found that I have been dealing with some really heavy issues the last while and have decided to not make it a priority. I guess now I realize that I really need the therapy.

A while ago I wrote a post entitled Bathing For Jesus, where I described how I have enjoyed reading and praying in the bath. The truth is that since I have started doing that the impact has been devastating. I know that God is a loving God and loves me, but it seems like he keeps hitting me over the head with his love. I feel like God is saying, "I love you so much, and I have also given you many things, many advantages in life." Then it seems like he is saying, "I love a lot of other people also, people who do not have the things you do, people who do not have the advantages you have...I gave you those things so that you would share what I have given you with those who do not have them...I have chosen you to love those people with what I have given you...I have chosen to love those people through you." This may not seem all that heavy, but for me it has been. For me I think that it means that I need to start getting to know what the issues of poverty are in my city, for me it means that I need to start doing something to learn from those people who suffer in poverty, for me it means that I need to start sharing some of the things I have (or maybe sacrificing some of the things I don't want to let go), for me it means I need to start living in a way that shows that I love people who live in poverty, not just the suburban people I come in contact with every day, for me it means I need to spend time getting to know those people, for me it means sacrificing time, money and energy doing things for other people then myself, for me it means attempting to inspire others to do the same, for me it means the potential of exposing my family to things that are outside of my comfort zone, to me it means PICKING UP MY CROSS and following Jesus, and that cross seems very heavy right now!


Anonymous said...

Boring, not funny at all.