SLOW AS ICE...BERG

A Big Decision

2011-09-22T09:21:00.000-07:00

If you know me, or have followed my blog, or been a member of the youth group or even attended at WEFC, you will have known that God has been changing my outlook on life for at least the last four years. It has been an incredible journey where my eyes have been opened to a lot of suffering and pain in this world.

Not only have my eyes been opened to this, but my heart has been as well and then along with that, my hands and feet feel the need to get involved. It has taken me a long time to really figure out what it is that my hands and feet should do, and there were many times that I was incredibly frustrated with that, and even wondered if I really believed all the things that I said I did. I wondered if I truly did care for people in need, or if I just liked the idea of being the person who cared about "social justice," but didn't really do anything about it.

Just over two years ago I took a group of youth and leaders to Hermosillo, Mexico. It was an incredible time. We saw horrible poverty, we saw great hope, and we interacted with amazing people. Sitting on the bus on the way back I asked everyone to talk about how this experience would impact their lives going forward. When my turn came, this is what I said (or something like it), "I really believe that God wants me to start something, something church-y, but it really has to have something to do with helping people in need. But I also have this really strong sense that I should not leave WEFC (the church I was working at)."

This conviction left me very confused. What was I supposed to do with this? How could I start something church-y and not leave this church. I tried a couple things, and really struggled with them. Nothing really took off, leaving me feeling like...I was a failure...or really didn't care like I said I did.

A year and a half later WEFC was asked if they would like to be given a church building in Point Douglas, one of poorest (financially) neighborhoods in Winnipeg. A church was shutting down, but wanted someone to continue working in the community. My heart nearly skipped a beat. But over the next few months I became convinced that maybe this was not the right thing to do (I am skipping a bunch here that I may let you in on some other day). This was an incredibly difficult time for me, and for our family as we dealt with our house having burnt down, and all the fallout from that. This decision, or lack thereof weighed heavy on my heart through all this.

In February, we were offered the job of taking on the lead of this church plant and we made the hard decision that this was the right thing for us to do. I remember thinking about what I would say to the youth I had spent 7 years with, and really did not want to leave. I stressed over it for a while and then I knew what I needed to say. I said, "remember when we were on that bus on the way home from Mexico..."

I had already told them!

Of course none of them remembered

This decision was a hard one, and for good reason...this is hard! So far (I have been in Point Douglas full time since June) I have not had major questions as to whether it was the right decision, but major questions as to how to do this, how to do this with a family, and sometimes major questions about my own worthiness for such a job.

The Best Babysitter EVER!!

2010-12-01T08:30:00.000-08:00

We have had a lot of babysitters, and we have had a lot of really good ones...but the situation that occured during our night out at a Grey Cup party was one that made us realize that we (and especially our kids) may have experienced the greatest babysitting feat of our lives!

We got a call from our kids around 8:30 to say that they loved us and to say good night. "We saw a rat!" says Owen (5). "You mean a mouse," Nicky says. We have had a mouse in "Moby" lately and so Owen was obviously confused. We stayed at the party a while longer and got home at 10:30 or so. Jocelyn (the aforementioned "Best Babysitter EVER!!") greets us at the door and says "...I was able to trap the rat." I was convinced that she was wrong and that I would find a mouse. We went to where she had stood up some books, moved some boxes and a shelf and formed them into a closed semicircle by the wall...we looked under the desk to see a long tailed, 6 inch long, bulgy eyed RAT staring at us, it sent shivers down my spine. Really?! a RAT?! in my HOUSE?!

What ensued next was Jocelyn and I (Nicky wanted no part of it), scaring the rat first under a book shelf and then out of that as I trapped it under a bucket. I slid cardboard under the bucket and took my trapped rat outside where it met it's early demise...a shovel must have fallen on it...

As I drove Jocelyn home she told me how she was reading a book to the kids and the rat ran across the room and out. She said she reacted calmly so that the kids wouldn't freak out...seriously?! After the kids were in bed she spent the rest of the evening tracking that dirty little rat. At one point running back and forth in the kitchen chasing it around with a broom stick. She said that whenever she stepped on something soft she thought it was that rat. She told me, "it was fun!" C'mon, really?! She had this great feeling of accomplishment when we caught that rat...seriously, she is amazing! Can you imagine? A strange house and you are spending your time with this stupid rat making its horrible little squeaking noises and running around the house.

We should be working on getting her locked into a long term babysitting contract...but she may have some serious bargaining power! Plus she may never want to come back again.

Yesterday we got a cat...

House Fire Update

2010-11-30T08:40:00.000-08:00

Today is 4 1/2 months since our house fire. Let me tell you that this has been a real up and down ride. In a lot of ways the first six weeks after the fire were the easiest in terms of being emotionally/mentally/spiritually strong (below I am showing the state of mind we were in during those six weeks - it is a blog entry I wrote that never got published). I also preached a sermon on those six weeks on August 29th which listen to here...on our church podcast. Don't get me wrong those times were hard as we moved from my parents house to one hotel room then another, to a borrowed house, to another hotel, and another hotel, and finally to a mobile home. Everything was so uncertain, but I felt strong and confident.

The second six weeks were probably the most difficult where I struggled to keep my head above water, where things got very dark for me emotionally and spiritually. The last six weeks have been a slow and arduous climb out of that dark place. Let me just say that I don't know how I would do this whole thing without a faith in God that just has held me up over this whole thing.

We are still living in our Mobile home (we call him "Moby") and we are able to see how things are coming along as insurance restores our house. We have a garage and a roof, and the framing inside is nearing completion. We are told that the house will be ready by the end of January...we aren't holding our breath on that.

We have so many friends who care about us and have supported us. Thank you so much for that support. When we heard about a family near Steinbach that lost their house and their husband and father to a fire, we hope they have the kind of support that we did/do.

Here is a blog post from a time about three weeks after the fire:

On July 21st we had a house fire. As soon as we were out of the house we stood on the front lawn as a family and realized that anything that we had in that house was not necessary. Everything we needed was right there in that little huddle of five people crying out to God. We have learned a lot in the last three weeks and it is now difficult to imagine what it would be like if this had not happened. As a family we have had our ups and downs for sure, but these last few weeks have been very full of moments where we have looked at each other and been filled with love and thanks that we still have who we have in this family. I would not want to go through this ordeal with any other family but this one.
Ben (9) is such a brilliant mind, he loves adventure and he looks at this whole ordeal as an adventure, he wants to be a part of the decisions and he understands enough about life to begin to figure out how insurance works and to realize the effort that people are going to in order to help us out.
Hannah (7) is the emotional barometer of our family. She wears her emotions on her sleeve and many times when she shows those emotions I recognize them in the rest of us. She is so filled with love for each of us and always loves to cuddle and comfort.
Owen (5) is so much fun! He really doesn't understand a whole lot which makes it great for him. He loves life and just brings us so much joy.
Nicky (##) is truly the love of my life. This whole experience has showed me that more and more. There have been so many times that I have looked at Nicky and said through tears, "I wouldn't want to go through this with anyone else." We have been married over 14 years, and I really think our love is deeper than ever. She helps keep me real, she helps me to laugh, she helps me to cry, she is so great at caring for and about our kids, she is still very concerned about caring for other people (if not more because of this whole thing), she looks into my eyes and truly understands me and yet still loves me. What else could I ask for?
We don't have a home, we don't have most of the things that fill a home, but we have way more than we need. We are so blessed. People have been so kind to us. We get notes of care on Faceboook, on this blog, email, and in our church mailbox. We have people who call us up, people who invite us over, people who bring us meals, people who bring us comfort, people who bring us presents, people who offer us their home, and people who can break my heart with a look of care and love in their eyes. We are in such good care. I don't know how people would survive all this without people like this around them. Most of these people come from our Church community...how do people get through life without one?
We have grown to love so many people through this all. One of the things we have been learning over the last while (and it has culminated in this experience), is to allow people to help us. We like to do things on our own, and if we can accomplish something on our own, we will not ask for help. We are realizing that as people help us our community grows and we grow to love our community. Thank you to all the people who help us!

House Fire!

2010-07-22T21:45:00.001-07:00

7 days ago would have found Nicky, myself, Ben, Hannah and Owen hardly able to comprehend how good we felt we had it. That was the day we took possession of our home. It was very exciting for us because it was a "country home" that we couldn't wait to have people come and enjoy with us.

As I write this it is now 24 hours from the time when I noticed a sound in the attached garage, going to investigate I noticed smoke coming in under the door to the garage, as I got closer I could hear the roar of fire. I quickly yelled to Nicky that we needed to get the kids and call 911, "THERE'S A FIRE!" After we woke the kids and herded them to the door we emerged from the front of the house to see the flames pouring from the front of the garage 20 feet long and 30 feet high, completely engulfing the car in parked in front of it. We called 911 as we expected to watch the whole house burn.

Neighbours came over and we were introduced to them for the first time as they invited us to stay in their home for as long as we needed! The firefighters arrived quickly and were actually able to put the fire out before it spread too far. There was a fire in the attic and the garage is almost completely gone. There is smoke and water damage throughout the house, as well as all the damage the firefighters did as they valiantly fought the fire.

We have never been more thankful for our family and for how safe we were. We love each other very much! We have over and over again recognized that we have all we need when we have our family even if we have nothing else. We have also been overwhelmed with support from our families and friends, we are so unworthy of your support, but thank you for it! We are all completely fine and we are looking forward to rebuilding our home.

You can pray for a speedy, smooth process with the insurance company, and you can thank God for protecting us in all this!

Trevor (on behalf of all of us)

da ose

2009-11-27T15:00:00.000-08:00

I am currently wearing what Nicky lovingly refers to as my panty hose, or support hose. A few months ago I was at my Dr. and she noticed my varicose veins on my leg. I told her I have had them for years. She decided to refer me to a specialist. When I went to see this specialist he prescribed support stocking for my left leg. I am starting to develop ulcers on my leg and because I am young I am getting away with it, but I won’t forever. I am supposed to wear them every day now.

On my way home I stopped in the place that he recommended for me, it was a prosthetics and orthotics store. I walked in and immediately felt out of place, there were a couple old ladies getting walkers fixed, there were a bunch of old man scooter’s lined up and a whole bunch of other things that I identify with old age...canes, walkers, blue hair and of course...support hose.

I got fitted for my hose and she told me that I would need to get a custom-made one. For the records she asked me how old I was, my response was, "too young to have a compression stocking!" Well, she measured me up and I was on my way home.

I got in the car and phoned Nicky, when I told her that I would need to have my compression stocking custom made, she replied, "what? can't you go to the big and tall girl store?" Sometimes she knows just what to say to make me feel better about myself.

A few weeks later I got a call saying that my stocking was in. As you can imagine, I was filled with excitement at the wonderful news. I went to get it and try it on. The stocking fitter girl (is that really a profession?) helped me put it on and told me some things about maintaining it etc. I have to wear a little silk sock and these fancy grippy rubber gloves while putting it on so that they don't tear. At this point I am feeling sorry for myself and concerned that this support hose will somehow affect my manliness.

To reassure me she told me that some men have trouble with the hose staying up because it slides on their leg hair. In the end my stocking fitter girl did make me feel better by stating these wonderful words:

"...but you won't have a problem with this (hose staying up) because you have muscular thighs."

She's right...I don't have that problem.

The Medium is the Message

2009-09-02T06:18:00.000-07:00

I am a Christian, I love Jesus deeply, and according to my church I believe all the right things. Sometimes I wonder though, if what I say and what I do are connected. Sure, I am a Pastor and I have made some choices to do what I think Jesus would want me to do, but does my faith and my action truly interact?

I read this morning in Frost and Hirsch's book that the medium is the message and as that applies to the Christian life, our actions are the message. Do my actions in my everyday existence communicate what Jesus means to me? I think all to often the answer is no...instead of communicating what Jesus means to me, my actions all too often communicate that I am selfish.

Do you want to be with the kids right now? No, I'd rather watch TV. Do you care about the poor? No, I really want a new iPhone (or laptop, or car, or house, or kitchen, or book, etc.). Do you care about people in your community that are hurting? No, I don't take time to be with them, I have too many other things going on.

Lord, I want my medium to be the message.

Problems with Passion

2009-08-28T05:52:00.000-07:00

I often look at passion as a negative thing. I hear things like this...I got in an argument and I got passionate and it got me in trouble...I got caught in a moment of passion, and now she's pregnant, we didn't mean for that to happen...I better be quiet now because or my passion is going to get me in trouble.

What if we looked at passion differently? What if we noticed that the problem was not so much our passion, but our direction. Michael Frost and Alan Hirsch write about this in their book The Shaping of Things to Come: Innovation and Mission for the 21st Century Church (this book is excellent if you love dreaming about the church, and what it could be - I will probably post more about it over the next while), they say that, "Passion is only evil when it remains in the directionless state, when it refuses to be subject to holy direction, when it will not accept the direction that leads toward God."

This is a beautiful picture of passion. The Church is often known to be a place where passion is to be suppressed and often not even talked about, but really the Church should be about directing our passions to the holy. Even our passions about sex? Yes. Even our passions about driving fast cars? Why not.

Let's allow ourselves passion, but let's point it in the the right direction, a holy direction.

Is it OK to Get Paid to be a Christian?

2009-05-20T20:10:00.000-07:00

I am a Christian...I believe in a dude named Jesus and I try to live my life like him...I am also a Pastor, which basically to me means that I get paid to...believe in a dude named Jesus and try to live my life like him.

I am increasingly uncomfortable with that idea. I often wonder if it cheapens my christianity, or if it makes who I am unauthentic.

I remember when I volunteered to work with young people I would often say things like this to the young people, "I just believe in this so much, I really love you guys, I don't get paid to be here, I do it because I truly care." I can't say that any more. I do believe that I do it because I love it, and I can't imagine doing anything else.

I guess I just want to be authentic in my beliefs and in sacrificing for those beliefs...I am not sure how I do that in the situation I am in.

Does it Surprise us When Homeless People do Something Good?

2009-05-14T20:11:00.000-07:00

There was a story that caught my attention a little while back in my city. At first I was happy about the story because it isn't often that homeless people are painted in a positive light. Here is an excerpt from the story:

Faron Hall, 44, was given a medal of valour by Mayor Sam Katz at a ceremony not far from the riverbank where Hall often sleeps. Hall saw a boy fall into the river last weekend and dove into the chilly, fast-moving water to pull him ashore. Now the man who has been homeless for about seven years has become the talk of the town.

I was excited to see that people would see that homeless people have heart, courage and respect for their fellow man. However, when I saw the same thing on the national news a few days later, as the story seemed to take off around the country I began to wonder...is it really that surprising to us? Is it so shocking that people who live on the street care about people?

In the time I have spent around homeless people that is the thing that sticks out to me more than anything. People who live on the street or in poverty tend to be more generous and caring about one another than anyone else I have ever met.

Reminds me of a sign I saw at a church I was driving by one day:

Poverty is a problem
Riches is not the answer

Jackhammer

2009-03-18T11:47:00.001-07:00

We are renovating our upstairs bathroom...so I am going to jackhammer in my basement...makes sense to me. It definitely is something I don't get to do everyday:

Church

2009-03-15T19:40:00.000-07:00

I work at a church, I have attended a church my whole life and if I were completely honest I love church (probably a bit of a love/hate). I am scheduled to preach on March 29th and I was thinking about speaking about the church. However, I am not sure that I completely understand what church was intended to be, in fact, I think there are many times when I think that I have completely misunderstood what church is supposed to be about.

Sometimes church seems to be misunderstood, sometimes people within the church do not represent it well, sometimes the way it is set up just does not work, sometimes the church does not seem to be at all close to what it should be...

I have some thoughts on these questions, but I am more interested in yours.

...but what is church supposed be? What is it that church is supposed to accomplish? What is it that church is doing well? What is it that church is not doing well? Why is it that church is misunderstood? What can be changed about the way it is set up?

I am curious about your thoughts on this. What has been your experience with church...what do you like? What don't you like? What would your dream church look like?

I See People

2009-03-13T13:52:00.000-07:00

Seeing people is at the same time simple and difficult. I remember when I preached a sermon about 1 1/2 years ago. I spoke on the story of the good samaritan and talked about how we should learn from the people we normally look down on (those on the margins - for me...the homeless). I remember that someone talked to me afterward and challenged me on it. He said he knows a lot of people in the inner-city who are not good people at all, in fact they do a lot of evil things. What are we supposed to learn from them? At the time I said that the evil things are not what we are to learn from them, but that we can find some good. I have always felt uneasy about that conversation because I did not think I answered well.

At the end of Tim Huff's book, Bent Hope, Steve Bell writes a Benediction. In it he says that Tim has an innate ablility to really see people. Not their problems and tragedies, not their lies, not the external decoys, but truly see who they are and that they are a person of value. That is really what I meant in my sermon 1 1/2 years ago, but did not really know it. That is how I hope to live. I hope to be someone who really sees people, I want to see my children, I want to see my wife, I want to see the people I (or most people) usually don't notice, and especially don't see.

So, you would think that this would be fresh on my mind as I went to volunteer at an inner city - drop-in mainly frequented by homeless adults this past week. I was there with a few people from our church. I met George (name changed) who I talked to for a long time. He told me all about his beliefs, his hopes, his dreams...many of which I thought were really wrong, but did not know how to respond to. As we were driving home after the evening, some of the people in my car were telling me about their experiences and the joy they took in really connecting with people. They didn't see drunk, or homeless, or unemployed people, they truly saw people, and were filled with love. I, on the other hand, told them about George and said, "I just didn't know how to counsel him."

This morning as I thought about George some more, I read Acts where it talks about Peter and John walking into the temple to pray...
"Now a man crippled from birth was being carried to the temple gate called Beautiful, where he was put every day to beg from those going into the temple courts. ³When he saw Peter and John about to enter, he asked them for money. ⁴Peter looked straight at him, as did John. (Acts 2:2-4)" They saw him, they looked straight at him and truly saw this man, this man who everyone passed by his whole life. I realized that I had only seen George's problems, his "wrong theology," his misunderstandings, I wished that I could go back and truly see George.

Going back to my conversation about my sermon, I wish I could have been wise enough to say, "It is not about what people do or the kind of things you can learn from them, but moreso it is about seeing past the problems, the evil, the garbage, the facades and looking straight into their eyes and actually seeing them."

I hope to look to see more often.

Brett Favre Rookie Card

2009-03-10T05:06:00.000-07:00

3 years ago Ben received a prize from his preschool teacher. It was a small bag full of a number of little things. There were little toys and trinkets, but the thing that immediately caught my attention was an unopened pack of Score Football Cards from 1991. I couldn't figure out why the pre-school teacher would be giving these unopened packages of football cards away. I cracked them open to see what was inside, it was a collection mainly of unknown (to me) football players.

There was one that caught my attention, it was a Brett Favre rookie card. One of the best quarterbacks to ever play the game! I couldn't believe it. Ben took the other cards and played with them and eventually they were all worn out and in the garbage. But I took Brett Favre and placed him on my bedside table thinking I might have my children's college fund right there.

Brett sat there and sat there, through the time I spilled a cup of water all over my bedside table, shoved under whatever I happened to put on this table. It collected much dust, and a few minor nicks and bends. A few weeks ago I didn't have a bookmark and stuck Brett into my book. Now I use him all the time in this way, I am sure Brett "college fund" Favre really enjoys being used as a bookmark.

So I thought I would advertise here, anyone want a Brett Favre rookie card? Mint...ish condition. I just discovered that there is one on eBay being sold for $5...probably not in as good condition as the one I have. I'll take the first $1000 offer.

My Work Against Homelessness

2009-03-08T18:34:00.000-07:00

I have been thinking quite a lot about homelessness (over the last two years especially) and have come to all kinds of conclusions about myself and the things that I (and the church) need to do in order to help people who are in that situation. I have been involved in a few organizations who work with homeless people and met with many people to discuss what I/we should be doing to help.

I finally discovered something very important that I can do right now. I am reading this book called Bent Hope which is a really interesting read. The author is a Youth Worker who works with young people who live on the streets in Toronto. He walks the streets and hangs out with them and helps when he can. He basically just tells the stories of his encounters with people and talks a little bit about what he has learned from them. I am loving it!

So, I know what I am supposed to do to help homelessness. In his book, pretty much everyone he encounters he mentions how they come from a family situation that is very messy...abusive, broken, hurting, manipulative, etc. My conclusion is this. One thing that I can do to fight homelessness is to be a good Father and husband. If my kids grow up in a home that they experience real love, then they will not have to experience homelessness.

My fight against homelessness has taken a bit of a different angle, but I believe it is incredibly important. I realize that this does not solve the whole issue of homelessness, but I know that it could for three little kids that I care a lot about!

Jesus for President

2009-03-02T07:12:00.000-08:00

I got Jesus for President for Christmas and I really enjoyed reading it. Shane Claiborne and Chris Haw really have inspired me to think more creatively when it comes to politics. It was very interesting to read it during the inauguration of Barack Obama and seeing the hope that people put in him. It would seem that a lot of people really look to Obama as a savior of some sort. Of course there are many others who look at him as something much different than a savior as well.

This book argues that Christians should not put their hope in any sort of politician or political system but that Jesus really is the only Savior that we can truly put our hope in. Living like Jesus is the way we are political. Christian's started out as being anti-empire when Rome would have nothing to do with them. Everyone was forced to say "Caesar is lord," but this was the time that Christians took their lives into their hands and instead said, "Jesus is Lord!"

I think that so many times it seems that Christians think that voting a certain way is their Christian act or duty, but really our Christian act or duty has so much more to do with what we do ourselves as opposed to how we vote.

Our Christian act or duty is to help those in need, supporting them and helping them in the hard times. Our Christian act or duty is to show mercy to one another (a different kind of justice). Our Christian act or duty is to pursue justice for the oppressed. Not vote for someone who does these things, but do them ourselves. We put our hopes in Presidents and Kings, but God did not even want that kind of structure for his people, he wants us to see him as our president, and follow after him.

I think the next time I vote (which is generally every few months in Canada) I will write in who I really want to vote for...Jesus.

You Know You are as Old as Trevor When...

2009-03-01T05:00:00.000-08:00

After shaving you go to wipe shaving cream from your hair near the temples and it doesn't come off, because it is grey hair
You remember life before computers
The computers you first used were measured in kilobytes (Commodore Vic 20)
You used to actually "dial" the phone
You played Pong when it first came out
You love 80s music
You used to be able to beat teenagers at most sports, and now you have to cheat to do it
You know you are not cool...and you really don't care (in fact you embrace your lack of coolness with bad jokes and purposefully wearing "bad clothes")
5 years seems like a short period of time
Your sports heroes who you are sure just came into the league are retiring
You are turning 35 today

"My" Youth

2009-02-26T20:39:00.000-08:00

I have been a youth pastor at Winnipeg Evangelical Free Church now for nearly 5 years. This means a few things, but one of the things it means to me is that the people who were in Grade 7 (the grade our churches youth ministry starts at) when I came to this Church are now in Grade 12, the poor kids have only had me as a youth pastor. Apart from feeling sorry for them, I also have a sense of "fatherly(ish?)" pride in who they are as people.

There are ups and downs in being a youth pastor, the ups come when I get to see young people making good choices in their life, the downs come when I see them making choices that have long-lasting negative impacts on their lives. There are many of each of these.

A couple weeks ago was a big up...the youth were in charge of the whole service at our church. This meant that they ran everything from ushering, to speaking, to singing, to sound and tech stuff. I know that these young people are talented passionate people, but it really gave me a sense of pride to have other people see it as well. I am so proud to see the people they have become...I know that I am a very small part in making that happen...but I am proud nonetheless that they are so great in spite of my weaknesses.

It's Cold Here in Winnipeg

2009-01-26T08:31:00.000-08:00

So I got up yesterday morning and stepped out into the cold. I thought to myself, "boy, it's really cold out here today." I hop in the car and drive to church. My route takes me past the Royal Canadian Mint where they have a screen that shows videos and the time and temperature. I glance at the screen just as the temperature flashes onto the screen. The screen tells me that it is -572 degrees celsius in Winnipeg...I began to be very thankful that my car had started.

Your Prominence Does not Give You Your Significance

2009-01-19T20:18:00.001-08:00

This title is a paraphrase of the great theologian and social commentator, former basketball player Chris Webber (I can't remember the exact line but this is pretty close), in the pre-game show of an NBA game today.

So true Chris! We often remember (and we should) the stellar contributions to society that people like Martin Luther King have given us. However, it is so true that a man like Martin Luther King Jr. only exists because of the "significance" of other people, the people that he rightly recognizes in his own immortal "dream" speech:

I am not unmindful that some of you have come here out of great trials and tribulations. Some of

you have come fresh from narrow jail cells. And some of you have come from areas where your quest -- quest for freedom left you battered by the storms of persecution and staggered by the winds of police brutality. You have been the

veterans of creative suffering. Continue to work with the faith that unearned suffering is redemptive. Go back to Mississippi, go back to Alabama, go back to South Carolina, go back to Georgia, go back to Louisiana, go back to the slums and ghettos of our northern cities, knowing that somehow this situation can and will be changed.

Each person who came to hear that speech and had been through so much was just as important or significant as Martin Luther King Jr. himself.

Each of us has the ability to have great significance, in fact I believe God created us to do just that. What is your significance?

Hey, by the way, has anyone noticed the USA is inaugurating their first African-American President tomorrow? I think that those people who went home "to the slums and ghettos" actually did have a very significant impact on the history of the most prominent country in the world.

Am I Growing Up?

2009-01-18T22:31:00.000-08:00

I was thinking back a bit on my life...there are many things that I regret, many things I wish would change. I think about deep things, really crucial things to the survival of my family and my own well-being. Things like, growing a beard, or driving fast, or watching football, or eating more than I should.

You see I used to grow a beard more or less by accident. I never shaved more than once a week, and I can pretty much grow a beard in that amount of time. So, sometimes I would shave, and sometimes I would trim. Now I shave probably on average about 2-3 times per week, and try to appear somewhat put together on occasion.

I used to drive fast and win any race I was having at any cost (sometimes the cost was quite high). The other day I was driving next to Nicky and I pulled out to pass her, got to 10 over the speed limit and slowed down because I was worried I might get a ticket. I feel a bit Granny about that.

I used to watch NFL Football on TV no matter what else was going on. Today we had company for lunch and I missed the first half of one game and then hung out with my kids and missed a bunch of another...and this is the conference finals!

I used to eat more than I should and think of it as a competition...oh yeah, I still do that.

My Pastor is God

2009-01-08T10:56:00.000-08:00

I have seen a disturbance in the holy water. People come to the altar to worship, but who are they worshipping. I heard a story recently from another youth pastor (thanks Jon).

There was a young boy who decided to become a Christian, and give his life to Jesus. He was very excited to tell people and one of the first he wanted to tell was the worship pastor. He walked up to him and excitedly said, "I gave my life to you today!" The pastor was a little taken aback, "do you mean you gave your life to Jesus today?" "Yeah, that's what I said, I gave my life to you." The worship pastor was a little confused and asked, "son, do you think I am Jesus?" "Well, you are aren't you?" the boy said, "I mean...we sing to you every Sunday."

This is a somewhat humorous (although disturbing) misunderstanding. But, I think I have seen this type of confused worship in many ways. Churches grow because people like the preaching, or because the worship pastor is so great, and I don't really think that is why churches should grow. I don't think most pastors set out trying to make their church grow because of them, they set out to make followers of Jesus and their personality winds up drawing people in.

You see this in some of the huge mega-churches like Saddleback, where people are drawn in by Rick Warren, or Mars Hill (Mark Driscoll) or Bethlehem Baptist (John Piper) or Mars Hill Bible Church (Rob Bell) or Lakewood Church (Joel Osteen). But you also see it to a smaller degree in other churches. Many people in our church would say they come to our church because of our pastor. I am not saying this to be critical of these Pastors or of their churches, I am just observing a phenomenon in our culture.

This type of understanding of leadership can be dangerous and misleading, because people begin to put their pastor too close to God and sometimes those pastors do not represent God very well, and most of us have a problem with power.

I wonder if it's time for churches to be more clear about where the leadership of their community comes from. In some way we need to

communicate that Christ is the head of the church (Eph. 5:23). I think it comes from a more communal approach to leadership. This is necessary, but needs a grass-roots movement that is much more difficult to embrace and live. But difficulty should not be a motivating factor.

What DO you know?

2009-01-08T10:03:00.000-08:00

Nicky was asking Owen (our 3 year old) a bunch of questions. He kept answering, "I don know, I don know, I don know." Finally Nicky said, "well, what DO you know?"

Owen's answer was well rounded and thought out...

"I know...nothing is impossible with God, I know...how to talk, I know...how to fart."

Apparently he knows three very important things.

Jesus was 33 When he Was Crucified

2009-01-07T08:00:00.000-08:00

Our Sr. Pastor mentioned in his sermon a while back that Jesus was 33 when he died. I guess it struck a real cord with me because I am still thinking about it, I guess the fact that I am 34 has something to do with it. I wonder at the things he accomplished, things that have had some staying power (2.1 Billion people claim to be his follower).

This has stirred me to reflect on my life, what have I accomplished in my 34 years? As I think about that I realize that the things that I pursue as "great things" are not very much like what Jesus considered to be great. Jesus didn't start any programs, he only spoke to crowds that gathered around him naturally (he didn't do any advertising). Jesus wasn't a dynamic personality, people were drawn to him because of who he was, not because he was a great leader, or a powerful person. The only group he formed was a group that just kind of wandered around with him seemingly aimlessly. He avoided crowds, had a quiet personality and what he considered great were things like meekness, mercy, peacemaking, the persecuted, hardly the makings of what I think of as great accomplishments.

I think I need to rethink what greatness looks like, and start being more like Jesus.

Entering the Mac World

2009-01-05T13:30:00.000-08:00

Mac's are cool, PC's are not. People who own them are also cooler than those who do not. You can usually tell who is an owner of a Mac before you even ask them. They probably meet at least 4 of the following 7 criteria:

dress a little more on the granola side of things
drink organic coffee
drive a diesel jetta and may even run it on veggie oil (or a prius, or perhaps ride a vespa)
they probably are involved in some sort of social justice cause
politically, they lean to the left
they are vegetarian
very interested in a wide variety of little known musicians

I probably fit one of the above criteria, and I don't really think of myself as a "cool" person. However I did decide to purchase a MacBook. I am very excited to be typing this post on my new laptop right now.

I recently noticed that this series of ads has little to do with the product itself. Really what these commercials are trying to communicate is, "Mac is cool, PC is not." This is an attitude I try to teach young people not to have, but now I have bought into it. I am starting to feel guilty...ooooh, but this thing just works so cool. I have never had a laptop before, now I have a new MacBook. Who cares about my own ethics!

What We Missed out on In Jr High

2008-12-18T14:01:00.001-08:00

Mark Oestreicher posted a really great part of a book that he is writing about Middle Schoolers. He and I must be a similar age, because I really identify with this stuff. Makes me feel old when I think about all that has happened in my lifetime. Enjoy the list...

scott rubin and i need a little help from you for our middle school
ministry book. in the “middle school culture” chapter, we have a list of things
that didn’t exist when we were in middle school (well, at least when i was in
middle school, in the mid-70s). here’s what we have:
- Cell phones
- The internet (meaning, websites and buying stuff online and everything
else that is so completely normal today)
- Text Messages
- IM
- Hybrid Cars
- Social Networking
- “Friends with benefits”
- “Bi-Curious”
- Cable TV
- Digital Video Recording (or TiVo)
- Mp3s and downloadable music
- DVDs
- Hi-Def
- Satellite Radio
- Xboxes and Wiis and other amazing gaming systems (“Pong” was introduced
when I, Marko, was a young teen, and “Space Invaders” had just showed up in the
commons of a local community college).
- Email
- Spam (the email variety – we had the stuff in the can, made of
humans).
- Any kind of camera, video or still, that didn’t need developing.
- Cordless phones
- In-ear headphones
- Ringtones
- Call waiting
- iChat or other video conferencing
- snowboards and wakeboards
- rollerblades
- an African American president and a female Secretary of State- Airport
Security (and National Security levels, and Terrorist threats)
- Internet porn
- snowboards and wakeboards
- rollerblades
- Starbucks
- Viagra
- Plastic Pop Bottles
- X Games
- Energy Drinks
- Home Theaters (?)
- The Simpsons, Spongebob, American Idol and a host of other dependable TV
staples
- Reality TV
- Crack Cocaine
- Minivans
- GPS
- Disposable Cameras
- Disposable Contacts
- Abortion Pill
- Doppler Radar
- Space Shuttle
- USA Today
- HIV
- Paintball and Airsoft
- Laser Tag
- ESPN
- iPods
- MTV (could be in the “started and faded away” list…)
- DNA fingerprinting
- Artificial Heart
- Fantasy Sports Teams (which are still lame)
- Cloning animals
- The SuperBowl as a kind of National Holiday (I’m reaching)
- Cutting (?)
- “Walkman” came & went — remember that!
- Suitcases with wheels on the bottom (seriously …. Nobody had em!)
- most piercings… Besides ears…
- McDonalds Playlands

this second list is things that didn’t exist when we were in middle school,
then came on the scene in a major way, and have already faded:
- Fax
machines
- CDs (seriously – who buys CDs anymore? They’re the betamax cartridge of
this generation.)
- Video tapes
- Internet chat rooms
- Really, we could put email on this list, since teenagers don’t use email
anymore, except to communicate with parents or teachers.
- Music videos played on MTV
- The Fresh Prince of Bel Air
- The Walkman (pre-mp3 cassette and CD players)

what are we missing?? would love to hear as many additional ideas as you
have…

What is Missional?

2008-12-16T19:18:00.000-08:00

Over the last few years I have been really thinking about the church, is it what God wants it to be? What is it that should change? What is it that should not change? As I have done this I have explored the concepts that emergent village explores, reading books by Brian McLaren, Tony Jones, and others. A lot of what they have to say, really connects with me, but I have always been left with a feeling of uneasiness in many ways.

I have kept reading them and enjoying their thoughts, but lately I have become more and more interested in the church/christian concept that is called Missional. Over the last few years I have heard missional talked about quite a bit, and have often wondered what it meant, but never took the time to really look into it. A few months back I decided to check out some definitions. When I clicked on friends of missional I was really blown away! The definition of a missional community fit so well with the thoughts that I have had about the church lately. This mindset makes so much sense to me. Here is a part of what really struck me as a definition of a missional church:

"Jesus told us to go into all the world and be his ambassadors, but many churches today have inadvertently changed the "go and be" command to a "come and see" appeal. We have grown attached to buildings, programs, staff and a wide variety of goods and services designed to attract and entertain people.
"Missional is a helpful term used to describe what happens when you and I replace the "come to us" invitations with a "go to them" life. A life where "the way of Jesus" informs and radically transforms our existence to one wholly focused on sacrificially living for him and others and where we adopt a missionary stance in relation to our culture. It speaks of the very nature of the Jesus follower."

A little while later I got to meet Jamie Arpin-Ricci because my friend Phil asked me to help share as part of his teaching at a Discipleship Training School. Jamie has thought a lot about missional and is really living it (in fact his blog is called missional.blog.com). A little while later I connected with Gord Sawatzky (a passionate missionary from our church who has become a bit of a mentor) who said he had been reading a book by Alan Hirsch that really inspired and challenged him to live differently.

I am starting to think that someone might be trying to say something to me...

Too Many Clothes

2008-12-11T23:02:00.000-08:00

About a year ago, I read Irresistible Revolution by Shane Claiborne and I remember being so overwhelmed with all the things I felt I needed to change in my life. At that point I made a decision to take one thing from each book that I read. I couldn't handle more than that.

A few weeks back I finished reading Ronald Sider's book, Rich Christians in an Age of Poverty. I once again could have been overwhelmed, but I decided to take one thing, (I might cheat and take a few) here is the thing I am taking from this book.

Sider talks a lot about living more simply and giving more to help the poor (especially giving to micro loan organizations), he mentions in his book that he thinks that most of the people reading the book could go 2 years without buying new clothes. I have decided to take the challenge (many people I know, especially the youth from my church, are thinking - hasn't he done that the last 15 years already?). Regardless, here are the items in my closet that I am starting out with.

Shirts

1 hoody
6 long sleeve shirts
2 sweaters
5 short-sleeved button up shirts
12 long-sleeved button up shirts
18 T-shirts or polo shirts

Pants:

4 Jeans
2 Cargo Pants
3 Casual Pants
4 Shorts
3 Swim Trunks

3 Suits and 1 Coat

44 Shirts! FORTY FOUR SHIRTS, am I serious?! I don't know if that is normal, but it is sickening to me. I really don't think of myself as being concerned about fashion, but somehow I have obtained XLIV shirts! Especially button-up shirts, I don't even like dressing up! I will not see new clothes for the next 2 years.

Anyone want to join me? Or at least let me know how many shirts you have just to see if I am a freak (or a pack rat) or not.

Ben is a Good Spellr

2008-12-09T21:51:00.000-08:00

Our oldest son, Ben (Grade 2) has been doing spelling tests every Friday for the past few months. He is really great at spelling and always gets 6 out of 6, or at worst 5 out of 6. It is fun to see him do so well at it. His teacher always gives the class 5 words that are 2 to 4 letters long and then the 6th word is a longer word like "surprise" or "spectacular."

One Friday Ben came home without his test, so we asked him how he did, he said he got 5 out of 6. Nicky said, "that's great!" and asked which one he got wrong, "did you mess up on beautiful?" "Nope," he says, "I spelled 'us' wrong." "Oh...how did you spell it?" "I spelled it a-s-s."

True story.

Are Confession and Repentance Important? 2

2008-12-09T08:44:00.000-08:00

I posted a few weeks ago about Rob Bell and Don Golden's book, Jesus Wants to Save Christians. I really appreciated Jearim's comments (on my Facebook) about confession and the scripture that he used was very inspiring to me.

I finished reading the book a while ago and really appreciated it. I realized that the whole idea of confession and repentance are extremely important to Rob, and that in fact may be one of the main points of the book. The whole book is about how followers of God throughout Biblical history have fallen into exile because they choose not to cry out to him, and when they do, God rescues them from that exile.

This is near the end of the book:

...in exile we can slip into despair,

or we can reimagine everything.

Confession.

Repentance.

A fresh start.

A clean
slate.

We cry out in our exile and God hears us and we experience
rebirth. (p. 174)

According to my understing of the book the difference is that compared to what I have learned there is a deeper understanding of what repentance means. Sometimes we get this idea that confession and repentance are just about praying the right words to God and then we receive his forgiveness. This book is saying that it is much deeper than that. How we live proves our confession is true, repentance is the action that follows the confession.

The book talks specifically about how we as North American Christians are living in a world where we have an overabundance and many in our world do not have enough. How can we call ourselves Christians and allow for this to happen?

Wally's World

2008-11-30T19:38:00.000-08:00

There was a boy named Wally, Wally was bigger than most other kids his age, and used his size to his advantage. At first it wasn't too bad, he would skip the line at the slide in the playground, or force people off the swings. As things went on, he realized he could use his size and strength to his advantage in many different ways. He had some of the smarter kids do his homework (under threat of a beating), and later on he started to steal lunches and money from the other kids at school.

There were a few times when some of the kids would complain and say that is was not fair that Wally was taking advantage of them, but Wally always seemed to find out and an appropriate threat was made to silence the criticism. Eventually Wally realized that he might need some of these people as friends and couldn't make too many enemies.

So, he came up with a great plan. He stole lunches from many of the kids at school, then he would pick through them and sell the good stuff to other kids. He would sell cheap too, much cheaper than the cafeteria or the vending machines at the school. After a while he had kids lining up to try and get the great stuff that Wally was selling for cheap. Things got especially busy after Halloween and before Christmas, when parents would pack really good lunches.

One time near Christmas, Wally had told the kids to meet him behind the school because he was going to be selling some stuff for really cheap, he told them the prices and many of the kids saved up because these prices would be tough to beat.

Wally had one of his cronies (Marty) "manage" the line, making sure that people were relatively orderly. When Wally showed up, he had some really good stuff and people started to get excited and tried to push Marty out of the way so that they could be the first one in line. Things got out of hand as many of the kids were mad, because people were cutting in line and so the pushing got more and more serious. Eventually Marty could hold them back no longer and he was pushed down and the kids rushed madly towards Wally trying to be the first to get a cheap candy bar.

Unfortunately, Marty was trampled to death in this ridiculous situation. His family was horrified and of all things Wally was the first to attempt to comfort the family. The comforting seemed hollow however, since Wally still sold his wares to the same kids who trampled Marty at second recess.

Wouldn't it be horrible if something like this actually happened?

I am Just Like a Professional Athlete

2008-11-25T20:40:00.000-08:00

Have you ever seen an interview with a major professional athlete, when they say something like, "I get paid to play a game that I love!" At which point I experience a bit of anger, jealousy and loath. I usually think something along the lines of, "well of course you should love to play a game and get paid millions of dollars to do it! Everybody would love that!" I guess I have to admit that the wishful thinking in me always wishes I would have pushed myself in some sort of sport, because then I surely would have been a professional athlete!!!??? Maybe that could be me saying that in an interview! "I get paid to play a game that I love!" In that moment I wish my Dad would have been more like Tiger Woods dad and spent hours and hours and hours and hours on the golf course with me...MAKING me a better golfer. Then I snap out of it...I would never have let my dad do that, I was way to lazy!

So, I realize I will have to settle into being who I am, the non-paid professional athlete (I win most times when I play bump at youth - that counts right?). I also realize that I am in just as good a situation as a professional athlete. Does anyone know what a professional youth worker does for a living. Here is an insight into some of the things I do:

Watching youtube videos as "research"
going out for cokes (paid for by the church)
holding random crazy competitions (like seeing how many double bubble you can have in your mouth at one time)
going out for burgers
beating grade 8 kids at bump
going out for lunch
watching people snort spaghetti through their nose and out their mouth
going out for coffee
smashing up an old car on purpose and legally
going out for fries
seeing people grow up in their faith (and, sadly, sometimes out of their faith)
blogging
having theological discussions
getting to hang out with people I love
challenging people and having them accept those challenges
doing things I would do even if I did not get paid for it

Hey, maybe I am just like a professional athlete! What do you like about what you do?

Advent Calendar?!

2008-11-22T21:57:00.000-08:00

We were at the toy store looking for some good toys for our kids and noticed a bunch of Playmobil Advent Calendars. One of them was a pirate set, you know, what says Christmas more than pirates!? Owen (our 3 year old) loves playmobil stuff and has a fascination with pirates, so we took a close look at it. Here is what we found:

Many of these things seem relatively inappropriate to me but the keg near the top left hand side is my favourite. Nothing like getting a keg to remind you of Jesus. There is a story about Jesus turning water into wine in some big basins, or kegs if you will.

Are Confession and Repentance Important?

2008-11-20T08:39:00.000-08:00

I am reading Jesus Wants to Save Christians by Rob Bell and Don Golden. I am only 4 chapters in but needed to throw this out there to help me process the things that he is saying. I love the way that Rob tells stories and this book is a great example of that. The authors have told basically the whole story of the Bible in these 4 chapters, weaving together the story of God and his relationship to people. How the story of the Bible is basically a story of oppression and freedom from oppression. When people call out to God they are freed from oppression, which is the ultimate meaning of Jesus life and death. Freeing us from the oppression of the law, and pointing us to grace. It is a beautiful concept and, so far, basically told as a great story.

My issue is this. There is never any mention of confession or repentance. There are plenty of mentions of things like, moving from oppression to freedom, moving from light to darkness, and becoming new creations. However, it is never mentioned that in order to make that move, there is a need for repentance or confession. It is more of a choice to follow in "the way" as opposed to the normal conservative christian idea of a prayer of repentance. I have to admit it has made me a little uneasy, what do you think. In order to be a christ-follower, are confession and repentance necessary? Is Rob Bell leading people astray by leaving this out of his book (and pretty much anything else I have seen or heard from him)?

Coffee Drinking Bullies

2008-11-19T11:45:00.000-08:00

I feel as though I am about to have a fight with a bully, I fully expect this post to be read as hurtful and condemning to many. That may be the case but here goes anyway. I have long been frustrated by coffee drinkers. I realize that probably 95% of those who are in the blogosphere are those who are regular coffee drinkers, actually *ahem* probably not regular coffee drinkers, they are people who are very particular about the coffee they drink.

Most times they take one sip of coffee and declare it to be horrible, or wonderful, or somewhere in between. They do NOT drink any free coffee, especially the coffee served at churches, they do not just go to the corner store for coffee, their coffee must meet very specific requirements and standards. If they make it at home they do not just use a coffeemaker, they must use a various assortment of grinders, presses, and perhaps going as far as to roast their own beans.

I know that I am not cool for criticizing coffee drinkers and their habits, because coffee drinkers are the cool ones. I know this because I have been made fun of when I go out for "coffee" with them and order a coke or a hot chocolate (is that a little whip cream on your upper lip there Trevor? hahaha). I also know this because of the condescending way in which coffee drinkers speak of bad coffee or, heaven forbid those who dislike coffee (when are you going to become an adult, Trevor? haha).

I have been told many times that you just have to "acquire a taste" for the nasty brew. I am just unsure why someone would feel the need to "acquire a taste" for something like coffee. I mean, teaching someone to acquire a taste for vegetables or healthy food, I can understand, but a drink that causes heart disease, high blood pressure, heartburn, stress, damage to mother's babies and horrible breath? I am not sure why I would work at "acquiring a taste" for it. It seems much like "acquiring a taste" for eating poo. Eventually you might like the taste, but does that mean it is good?

Actually, I am convinced that coffee drinkers are the weak ones...cool, but weak...some time ago (usually in late high school or early college), they got together with their friends and someone said, "c'mon everyone is doing it! It will help you, you can study all night if you drink a pot of it...c'mon!" and they gave in and sucked back some of the horrible brew, now they fit in, and were "cool." Eventually, after a few experiences like this they were addicted and can not go back, although they would never want to.

I know that I am not cool, but that hasn't stopped me in the past. I don't need coffee, or the approval of coffee drinkers to make myself feel good. I will just live in my little coffee free bubble over here and drink my whipped cream hot chocolate (are you still drinking children's drinks Trevor? haha).

New Blogger

2008-11-07T09:08:00.000-08:00

You must check out Graham's blog, he is a good friend of mine who has just entered the blogosphere. I have always really enjoyed my conversations with Graham and I always look forward to getting together with him. When we do my thoughts are challenged and provoked and I always come away inspired to be more authentic in my own faith and push the church to do the same. Hopefully he will do the same for you in this venue.

I Cry

2008-11-04T23:19:00.000-08:00

The last 6 months or so, I have been easily moved to tears. It has lead to some interesting moments, like the time I was sitting at the church denomination I am a part of had their national conference and the general session speaker was speaking. He shared an emotional story that obviously struck a chord with me. I remember getting choked up, tears streaming down my face, but the crazy thing is, that is not where it stopped. I realized that I needed to hold back the sobs, I start looking around and realize that no one else was finding this particular story all that emotional (or at least I saw no other tears). I also realized that my sobs were becoming more evident to the people around me (as evidenced by the people looking away and pretending they were not staring at me). I began to really hope the speaker would move on to something funny, or perhaps something I could get mad about, anything but sad...finally he did.

I am not really embarrassed that I cry, although I know a lot of men my age who would be. But, this last few months has been exceptional for me. What is it? Why am I more easily affected in this way? These questions run through my mind, without a real solid answer. I cry at movies, I cry reading blogs like Phil's the other night, I cry when I pray, I cry at sermons, I cry in times of reflection, I cry when I think about my kids, I cry at the state of my family. I don't know what to make of it.

This evening I was listening to an excellent brand new book by Cathleen Falsani called Sin Boldly, which you can download here for free (that's an awesome opportunity you don't want to miss). She was quoting Frederick Buechner who said, "Pay attention to the things that bring a tear to your eye or a lump in your throat, because they are signs that The Holy is drawing near."

Maybe I am not a big wimp after all, maybe The Holy is drawing near to me. That would actually be great, because in the last 6 months I don't know if I have ever felt a greater need for The Holy, I need guidance to know where to go, I need direction to know how to handle difficult situations, I need love and care to help me with my hurts. Interestingly, these last six months have been a time when I have not felt a lot of leading or direction into big new things in my life, but is a time where I have been strongly convinced that I should be faithful in the little things, the everyday things, and the things that I am already chipping away at. I am a bit confused, "is that really you God?"

Colonoscopy Humour (if there is such a thing)

2008-11-02T22:02:00.000-08:00

I was laughing out loud as I read this one...

Thanks Greg for sending it!

ABOUT THE WRITER
Dave Barry is a Pulitzer Prize-winning humor columnist for the Miami Herald.

This is from newshound Dave Barry's colonoscopy journal:

I called my friend Andy Sable, a gastroenterologist, to make an appointment for a colonoscopy. A few days later, in his office, Andy showed me a color diagram of the colon, a lengthy organ that appears to go all over the place, at one point passing briefly through Minneapolis . Then Andy explained the colonoscopy procedure to me in a thorough, reassuring and patient manner. I nodded thoughtfully, but I didn't really hear anything he said, because my brain was shrieking, quote, 'HE'S GOING TO STICK A TUBE 17,000 FEET UP YOUR BEHIND!'

I left Andy's office with some written instructions, and a prescription for a product called 'MoviPrep,' which comes in a box large enough to hold a microwave oven. I will discuss MoviPrep in detail later; for now suffice it to say that we must never allow it to fall into the hands of America 's enemies.

I spent the next several days productively sitting around being nervous.
Then, on the day before my colonoscopy, I began my preparation. In accordance with my instructions, I didn't eat any solid food that day; all I had was chicken broth, which is basically water, only with less flavor. Then, in the evening, I took the MoviPrep. You mix two packets of powder together in a one-liter plastic jug, then you fill it with lukewarm water. Then you have to drink the whole jug. This takes about an hour, because MoviPrep tastes
- and here I am being kind - like a mixture of goat spit and urinal cleanser, with just a hint of lemon.

The instructions for MoviPrep, clearly written by somebody with a great sense of humor, state that after you drink it, 'a loose, watery bowel movement may result.' This is kind of like saying that after you jump off your roof, you may experience contact with the ground.

MoviPrep is a nuclear laxative. I don't want to be too graphic, here,
but: Have you ever seen a space-shuttle launch? This is pretty much the MoviPrep experience, with you as the shuttle. There are times when you wish the commode had a seat belt. You spend several hours pretty much confined to the bathroom, spurting violently. You eliminate everything. And then, when you figure you must be totally empty, you have to drink another liter of MoviPrep, at which point, as far as I can tell, your bowels travel into the future and start eliminating food that you have not even eaten yet.

After an action-packed evening, I finally got to sleep. The next morning my wife drove me to the clinic. I was very nervous. Not only was I worried about the procedure, but I had been experiencing occasional return bouts of MoviPrep spurtage. I was thinking, 'What if I spurt on Andy?' How do you apologize to a friend for something like that? Flowers would not be enough.

At the clinic I had to sign many forms acknowledging that I understood and totally agreed with whatever the heck the forms said. Then they led me to a room full of other colonoscopy people, where I went inside a little curtained space and took off my clothes and put on one of those hospital garments designed by sadist perverts, the kind that, when you put it on, makes you feel even more naked than when you are actually naked.

Then a nurse named Eddie put a little needle in a vein in my left hand.
Ordinarily I would have fainted, but Eddie was very good, and I was already lying down. Eddie also told me that some people put vodka in their MoviPrep. At first I was ticked off that I hadn't thought of this is, but then I pondered what would happen if you got yourself too tipsy to make it to the bathroom, so you were staggering around in full Fire Hose Mode. You would have no choice but to burn your house.

When everything was ready, Eddie wheeled me into the procedure room, where Andy was waiting with a nurse and an anesthesiologist. I did not see the 17,000-foot tube, but I knew Andy had it hidden around there somewhere. I was seriously nervous at this point. Andy had me roll over on my left side, and the anesthesiologist began hooking something up to the needle in my hand. There was music playing in the room, and I realized that the song was 'Dancing Queen' by ABBA. I remarked to Andy that, of all the songs that could be playing during this particular procedure, 'Dancing Queen' had to be the least appropriate.

'You want me to turn it up?' said Andy, from somewhere behind me. 'Ha ha,' I said. And then it was time, the moment I had been dreading for more than a decade. If you are squeamish, prepare yourself, because I am going to tell you, in explicit detail, exactly what it was like.

I have no idea. Really. I slept through it. One moment, ABBA was yelling 'Dancing Queen, feel the beat of the tambourine,' and the next moment, I was back in the other room, waking up in a very mellow mood.
Andy was looking down at me and asking me how I felt. I felt excellent.
I felt even more excellent when Andy told me that It was all over, and that my colon had passed with flying colors. I have never been prouder of an internal organ.

On the subject of Colonoscopies...
Colonoscopies are no joke, but these comments during the exam were quite humorous..... A physician claimed that the following are actual comments made by his patients (predominately male) while he was performing their
colonoscopies:

1. 'Take it easy, Doc. You're boldly going where no man has gone before!

2. 'Find Amelia Earhart yet?'

3. 'Can you hear me NOW?'

4. 'Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet?'

5. 'You know, in Arkansas , we're now legally married.'

6. 'Any sign of the trapped miners, Chief?'

7. 'You put your left hand in, you take your left hand out...'

8. 'Hey! Now I know how a Muppet feels!'

9. 'If your hand doesn't fit, you must quit!

10. 'Hey Doc, let me know if you find my dignity.'

11. 'You used to be an executive at Enron, didn't you?'

12. '...now I know why I am not gay.'

And the best one of all....

13. 'Could you write a note for my wife saying that my head is not up there?'

Rotten Meat

2008-10-30T08:17:00.000-07:00

What keeps meat from rotting? One way to do that is to salt it, this method was widely used in Bible times. In Matthew 5:13 Jesus says to a bunch of his followers "you are the salt of the earth." In other words, the world is the meat and you are the salt, you help to keep the meat from getting rotten. Here is where I think that we have missed out on something. We (the church) keep removing ourselves from the world more and more, we look down on all the horrible things that are going on in the world and shake our head and say "tsk, tsk." There are horrible things going on in our world (sexual promiscuity, hatred, racism, oppression, drugs, alcoholism, etc.) so we withdraw ourselves from it in order to protect ourselves from these horrors. We create our "Christian bubble" and pray that no one will burst it. We make sure our kids hang out with the right crowd so that they will not be corrupted, we don't hang out in certain places so that we won't be corrupted.

I think it was Brett Ullman who was saying that right now the church (the salt) is looking at the rotten meat on the counter, holding our nose to it and saying, "why are you going so bad?" What do we expect? If we are to be the salt, how can the meat be blamed for going bad? Is our faith so weak that it won't last if we are exposed to bad things? Is our faith so weak that we can not risk contacting those who do not believe the same as us, for fear that they might rub off on us (getting rubbed by rotten meat does not seem attractive). What about us? Should salt not be mixed in, seasoning the meat?

Pink - it's my New Obsession

2008-10-29T07:44:00.000-07:00

I am opposed to pink, well not really opposed, but opposed to what it stands for, when it stands for something I am against. If that makes any sense at all. When it comes to my daughter Hannah, I have always resisted when she wants to wear pink, have pink dolls, have pink shoes (or pink camouflage shoes for that matter). Now she has asked us if she can paint her room pink (the second she in this sentence refers to Nicky and I, since our 5 year old will not paint her own room). The funny thing is I have embraced pink in my life, I have a shirt that some people call pink (actually, it is more of a salmon colour), back in the 80's I remember having a flourescent pink t-shirt, flourescent pink shades and many other pink accessories. I also own a beautiful flourescent pink toque that I love to wear on youth nights (or when I was driving the tractor at camp)

I guess my issue is not with the colour pink, it is with the stereotype. I don't want my little girl being taken with pink because it is such a stereotypical girl colour, and I want her to be free to be herself, not what she thinks the world wants her to be like. I want to make a statement myself about stereotypes of men, so I wear pink things. I guess my obsession with pink goes past an old Aerosmith song right to the heart of really important things...OK maybe it's just a stupid obsession...sure Hannah, "you" can paint your room pink (ugh).

What's more important? food or preaching?

2008-10-23T14:04:00.000-07:00

This morning I happened to check out a blog by Mark Westman. I don't know him, but he made a comment on my blog so I thought I would check him out. It so happened that on the morning I was preparing to go speak to the "captured" audience at Union Gospel Mission I read his blog about UGM and the question of when and if to preach to hungry people (should we force them to sit in a sermon before they get their food?) I really appreciated the discussion there, so go check it out here. I put in my two cents for what they are worth (probably not 2 cents).

do you hang out with the poor?

2008-10-21T09:59:00.000-07:00

What a great question. One that has caused me to really think and reflect on what I wrote myself. It was left as a comment under my last post. Do you hang out with the poor. I had a few thoughts on how to respond to the comment, the first was defensiveness..."of course I hang out with the poor!" after which I would go on to exaggerate the amount of time I spend with the poor. The second thought in response to this might have been, "maybe you misread what I wrote, I said 'let's go find Jesus in the poor...' I didn't say 'I have been, why aren't you?'" Therefore excusing me from having to feel guilty, since I was challenging all of us to do this - including myself. However, I realized the question could be an honest question of how I spend my time, not an accusatory question that insinuates that I don't spend my time with the poor.

The fact that I became defensive bothers me, because I have a heart for people who are poor, and I talk about spending time with them and yet I do not do it. About a year ago I started visiting a mission on a regular basis just to be with people...some issues came up with schedule and the missions request for me not to be there at lunch if I wasn't going to "do" anything. I wish I could say that I continued spending time with poor people because that is important to me, it is disturbing to me that I don't do this much at all (a couple of occasions I have stopped by to see some friends). It is also disturbing to me that I could compose a post such as the one I did, and not have some sort of sense of hypocrisy or guilt.

So, to "anonymous," thank you so much for your question, it is now working in my heart to convict me of the fact that I must respond with my life to my own post.

Blog Action Day 2008

2008-10-15T11:02:00.000-07:00

Today is Blog Action Day 2008, a day when Bloggers come together to blog about the same topic. This year the topic is one that is really close to my heart, poverty.

There are so many poverty statistics...like the fact that 1.2 billion people live on $1 a day or less, or the the fact that another 1.6 billion live on $2 a day or less - 2.8 billion people. People who struggle every day in order to get food to put in their bellies and the bellies of their children. Meanwhile, the United States spends 30 - 50 billion dollars every year on diets and expenses related to reducing calorie intake! What is wrong with us?!

We need to do something, something that makes inroads on this situation...but you are only one person, so don't bother unless you can make a major impact...NO, you are one person that can make a small impact, but many small impacts creates a very large impact (ask anyone who has been buried by an avalanche of millions of small snowflakes). My challenge to you on Blog Action Day 2008: Poverty, is this...get to know someone who struggles to keep themselves fed. There are people who are not difficult to find, you probably know where...why don't you spend some time with them...maybe buy them dinner. As you get to know people, you start to understand the problem even more and once you know someone who struggles with this, you can't help but act. So, let us all get to know someone who struggles with poverty.

While talking about the impoverished and needy Jesus said, "whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me (Matt. 25:40)." Let's go find Jesus in the poor and impoverished, I don't know about you, but I would like to get to know him.

All is Vanity

2008-10-14T18:42:00.000-07:00

My life is full of programs that I have thought up, ministries that I lead. I believe in them, I think they do good things, exciting things, probably even God-ordained things. I also try to do great things with my family, fun things, family-building things, even things that intend to lead them to see a picture of what Jesus looks like. Is it possible that even these things are vanity? Is it possible that the things I hold most dear are like a vapour?

I listened to two sermons on the way home from Boissevain yesterday. Both of them were from the Youth Specialties convention - NYWC last year. I have had them on my iPod for almost a year now without listening to them. Interestingly enough, after all this time they both really hit me at an appropriate time. I have been really struggling with the idea of just focusing on seemingly small things and both these sermons (one by Francis Chan and one by Phil Vischer) talked about how the only thing that really matters is that we are completely in love with Jesus, above any dream, ministry or vision.

I am so convinced right now that the only thing that matters in my life is to passionately pursue Jesus. Cultivating that relationship with him through connecting with him through prayer and reading the Bible, and through seeing him in the eyes of other people (especially those in need).

I am starting to feel a bit of a sense of freedom from all the dreams, ministries and programs that I have put before myself. I am realizing that my full pursuit ought to be squarely on relating to Jesus and living like him. I am praying that my focus will remain staid on what matters most, because I realize that all else will fall in place as I do that.

An Intruder at Night

2008-10-05T18:35:00.000-07:00

It's three o'clock in the morning, when I am roused from my bed. There is a loud bang that came from the deck. At first I think nothing of it, but a few minutes later there is some more shuffling and a bit more sound. Nicky and I are both sitting up in bed. "There is definitely someone there," I say. I climb out of bed, my heart racing, is someone really trying to break into our house while we are here? I look behind the bedroom door for any sort of weapon to take with me (the right to bear arms has not been an excuse for us to buy a gun), thankfully I find a crow bar there. It feels like it could do some damage. I slowly walk through the living room to the kitchen and towards the back door where the sound had come from. I can't see a thing outside since it is pitch dark...I clutch the crow bar and flick on the outside light and swing open the door simultaneously prepared to attack. There, standing about 2 feet away from me is the bandit...a raccoon...digging in my garbage. I yell and shake the crow bar at it and it runs off into the neighbours yard. So embarrassing and city-person of me!

I am a Liar

2008-10-02T10:35:00.000-07:00

Almost 24 years ago I started waking up in the morning and telling my Mom I had headaches. I missed a lot of school that year (Grade 5) because of the headaches. I missed so much school that my report card for the middle term of grade 5 does not have any grades listed on it. I had headaches all through school and eventually, when I was 16 I dropped out of school. For a few years I tried working and various ways of going to school. I did not graduate from High School.
When I was 19 I went to Winkler Bible Institute - I spoke to the Admissions guy 5 days before school started, I told him, "I don't have a high school diploma, I don't have any money, can I come to your school?" He said, "sure, we will work things out." During that year I still had headaches...I also met Nicky there, and we married 2 1/2 years later. She always cared for me and supported me when I had headaches. My headaches caused me to miss a lot of classes and get incompletes in a number of my classes.
That summer I made a trip to BC with my Mom to go see a specialist about my headaches (My parents were always searching, they took me from Doctor to Doctor to try and figure out treatment for my headaches, they went to bat for me at school, so that they wouldn't kick me out or fail me in classes - they were my biggest supporters). On the way home from BC we stopped in Calgary at a cousins house. We went to church with them, they prayed over me there with power and conviction asking God to stop the headaches. After that experience, I never had another headache.
1 1/2 years later I spoke to my wife of 6 months, I told her that I had never actually had headaches and that they had been a lie that I had told for 9 years. I remember her crying and asking me how I could do that, I remember feeling deep remorse in some ways, but, having told the lie for so long, I had become numb to much of the remorse. I remember regretting deeply who it affected my relationship with Nicky. Telling Nicky was only the beginning...I spoke to my parents who were deeply hurt but I remember the first words that came out of their mouth so clearly..."we forgive you." I spoke to Nicky's parents, that was brutal because it came at the same time I had lost my job driving truck, so I sat in their living room telling them that I was a liar and oh yeah by the way, unemployed too...so your daughter, who I have been married to for 6 months is in great hands. I spoke to my Pastor at Church and asked if I could go in front of the church and apologize to the whole church - since I had shared there many times about my headaches and people were always praying for me.

I remember people telling me that they would have taken that secret to the grave. It made me wonder how many secrets people carry around daily. I probably would never have been caught in this lie, I was the only one who knew it was a lie. People suspected that it was a lie, but there is no way they could ever prove it. I could easily have taken this secret to the grave, but how could I? I remember the relief of being freed from the lie, but I also remember the awkward conversations with people for years afterwards and even now, on occasion. "Oh, by the way, I haven't seen you in a while, how are the headaches?" "Uuuuhhhmmmm." I remember the hard conversations with close friends and family, the questions kept coming and I had very few answers (I am still trying to figure out why I did this). Counseling was necessary for Nicky and I (especially me) and I participated in that. I do remember though, that the more I talked about it, the more I allowed people to talk with me about it, the more it seemed there was healing. Healing from a wound that they did not even know existed, but healing just the same. Through this experience I believe that some of my good friends became even better friends. I was a more authentic person, I shared my struggles with them, I had always tried to "look" good, now I was able to show what was actually going on, not just the good stuff.

I am free from this lie now, I believe I have received a full pardon, I believe God granted me that healing when I admitted what I had done and asked for that healing, also believe that he did heal me that day in Calgary when people prayed over me. He healed me of the need to have the "headaches." I believe that a lot of my friends and family have forgiven me as well. I still suffer some consequences, however, for example, when I get sick for real I always know that Nicky is a little unsure...is it for real? is it being exaggerated? I don't blame her for the doubts I blame me...it's 12 years later and I am still building the trust, but if I had kept that secret the trust might be there, but it certainly would not have been warranted. I would much rather eventually have trust that is warranted.

I am of the Wrong Shape!

2008-09-25T11:09:00.001-07:00

Today I started something that I have been talking about for years. It all began when I was a youngster. I remember looking at my uncle and noticing a funny shaped round belly on an otherwise very skinny frame. To me it reminded me of a skinny pregnant woman. I remember realizing that I have a similar build and I remember hoping that I would never wind up with that crazy shape. I am 34 now, and though I would probably still be considered tall and skinny, I am starting to lose the skinny part of that distinction. People used to often say things like, "how do you eat so much, and stay so thin?" Now they say, "how do you eat so much?" I have noticed that I am starting to get the round belly that my uncle had, and horror of horrors I am starting to grow two things on my chest that only belong on women. Yes, man-boobs!

The breaking point came this weekend, when I was at a Vikings game in Minneapolis (they won, woohoo), I realized that when I was climbing the stairs at the metrodome (and we didn't have many to climb) my legs became wobbly, I was sweating profusely and my heart rate was way too high. As we were driving home, we were talking about how having kids and a busy life can really take away from having an active lifestyle - I don't really have time to play basketball anymore, or floor hockey, or anything half regular at all - or at least that is my excuse. I might run around with my kids on occasion, but they are 7, 5 and 3, and I can easily beat them at whatever we are doing without really breaking a sweat, so I don't try hard enough to break a sweat.

So today, I started my workout, here at church, where I work. I talked to Nicky and she was OK with me not coming home for lunch and spending that time working out in our gym (thankfully our church sanctuary converts into a gym every week). I love to play basketball so I designed myself a basketball workout...here is what I did:

Warm up - Stretching - shooting hoops - running for the rebound and putting in a layup
Cardio - How many layups can I do in 5 minutes? (26 apparently) I run full court to do each lay up and must put it in.
Strength and conditioning - Push ups - how many can I do in 1 minute? (20 apparently - ugh) - Jumping - I touch the basketball to the rim 10 times on each side
Cool Down - 20 post up moves, plus shooting hoops as before, then stretching.
Shower

I realize that this is probably pathetic compared to what a lot of you do but it's a start for me. A couple things I learned through this process. 1. Push ups are ridiculously hard, especially when you have put on about 35 pound since the last time you have done them. 2. I can't dunk the basketball anymore. 3. It is really hard to get the ball in the basket when you are super tired. 4. Bring a towel when you need to shower - the paper towel works but that is really wasteful! 5. You still sweat even after you have showered - allowing me to make all kinds of friends in the office.

A Function of Greed

2008-09-12T09:19:00.000-07:00

"The Event" happened in our family and it forced us to think about greed. I won't tell you what "The Event" was, but let's just say that one of our kids did something that will be regretted for a long time. However, this action has lead us to consider what we are teaching our children about greed. The first thing we thought of was all the things that we allow our kids to do. We let them play Webkinz, where the whole idea is making money to spend on stuff...we let them stare at the Sears Wishbook for hours on end so they can drool over all the things they want...we let them look at websites online that basically exist to sell them things...we take them to stores just to look at toys...we buy them things. All these things, we decided, encourage greed, so we thought it best to put a stop to many of these things. We told our children that we would not be buying them anything for a while (at least until they are "ungreedy" as one of the kids put it).
While it was difficult for us to make some of these decisions, it was not as difficult as our next realization. We were planning on having a garage sale at the time of "The Event." We were going to sell all our junk as well as a number of great baby things that we have no need for any more (can I hear a "Hallelujah!"). We also told the kids that they could choose some things and that they would be allowed to keep the money from some of what they sold. The kids were also going to sell chocolate bars and drinks and keep the profits, our thinking was it would teach them about money-management and give them an entrepreneurial spirit (what can be more important then that?) After "The Event" however, we realized that this may not be helping with the whole greed thing...so we eventually decided that our garage sale would become a benefit. We would raise money that would go towards a number of different charities (for kids that don't have enough) and this seemed like a great idea. Until we realized that this now meant that we would be going through a lot of work so that other people would benefit, not us. This became a bit of a problem for us parents. We had a few ideas of where the money for the garage sale could go. There are some much "needed" house renovations that we have been saving for. There is the Mac I really want to get, there are many things that we want. I guess greed is something you learn, and it was our hesitance to change the garage sale that helped us to realize that our kids were learning from us. We decided to have the garage sale, and we had a great time as a family selling our stuff and raising money.

I was thinking though that many things in my life (and I would guess in others) are a function of greed. Besides being greedy for things, I can also be greedy for a better situation, maybe a different neighborhood would make my life work better, maybe a different way of doing ministry would be more satisfying, etc, etc. I think we can get greedy in just about everything...the way we worship (I want more of God), the way we give (expecting praise, or something in return), the way we interact with people (expecting them to care for us more then we care for them). I guess I need to examine my motives more often. Thanks to "The Event," I am getting that chance.

Rock and Roll!?

2008-09-12T09:16:00.000-07:00

This has got to be the best thing since sliced bread. Amazing! I found this on my friend Phil's blog.

It Takes Time...

2008-09-10T20:00:00.000-07:00

This weekend we had a BBQ at our church. We invited some friends that we know because of Ben's school. It was interesting to bring them into that world (you know...the church world), but what struck me is that we have lived here in Winnipeg (Windsor Park specifically) for 4 1/2 years and this is the first time we have actually invited any adult friends to anything at our church. I have noticed lately that we are now starting to feel comfortable in our community, when we go to school with our kids we know a lot of the kids and their parents, when we go to sports events with our kids we are getting to know a bunch of the families there as well. 4 1/2 years seems like such a long time for us (this is a record for us living in one place) but we are really just starting to build really good relationships with people. I am reminded of a couple things...when we moved to Winnipeg I remember our Real Estate Agent saying that on average people live in the same house for 2 years...also, one of my professors at Providence College reported to me that the average length of time a Youth Pastor stays on at a church is 18 months. We so easily make moves and think that it is the best thing to do, but relationship is the base value for just about anything that you do...how can all this moving and uprooting be a positive thing?

The Youngest

2008-09-05T07:56:00.000-07:00

We have three children...Ben (7), Hannah (5) and Owen (3). The first two I would definitely describe as skinny, but the words I choose to describe Owen would not include that same word. It could have something to do with the way he wakes up. Owen will walk into our room, anywhere between 6:30 and 7:30 saying, "I need beckist (that's Owen for: Breakfast). I think the first thought when he wakes up is, "I NEED FOOD!" If we try to tell him that he will have to wait for "beckist" he proceeds to completely lose it (explanation: he is the youngest...and we do think he is cute, he might get his way when he shouldn't...on occasion). He has been known to cry, "I NEED BECKIST, I NEED BECKIST, I NEED BECKIST...(and so on)" This whole thing has lead to some really interesting problems with hand-me-downs, you see Ben grows out of his clothes when they are too short for him (thank goodness for adjustable waists because his are still at the skinniest settings at this point), well if we take those pants directly from Ben and put them on Owen they MIGHT fit him in the waist but they will be about six inches too long for him.

If we are able to eventually convince Owen that he doesn't need to have "beckist" immediately after awakening we will be introduced to another idiosyncrasy of our Owen because the next question will be, "can I get dressed?" This would seem to be a reasonable question, but at 6:30 on a Saturday morning when you are talking to a 3 year old who most often needs help getting dressed, and who loves his clothes so much (at least certain ones) it can be slightly annoying. If the clothes that he wants to wear (right now it's a pirate shirt - that actually is quite cool!) happen to be dirty (because he wore them the last 3 days straight while adorning it with peanut butter, honey, ice cream, spaghetti sauce and other unidentifiable, unwashable stains), he will not be one bit happy. I love my Owen, but I can't help but think, "Some day, I will get to sleep in...aaaaaahhhhhh...."

God is Love?

2008-08-27T20:09:00.001-07:00

The Bible uses the phrase "God is love" (1 John 4), and Christians do believe that this is true. However, if you go to a Christian church you are more likely to hear what God doesn't love about us, or what we need to do in order to live up to God's standards, then you are to hear how much God loves us. My friend Graham pointed this out to me the other day and it struck me. If we look in the Bible we find a lot about what we need to do in order to become better people. If we go to church and hear only about what we need to do in order to become better people, are we missing something? Maybe we are. The problem with only hearing this is that it can lead to legalism and/or guilt. I think what we could be missing is the basis for all the morals and behaviors that are spoken of in the Bible. The basis is his love. I believe that God has made a way for us to be imperfect and still have a relationship with him. I believe that we can not do ANYTHING that can separate us from his love...but, God loves us so much that he wants what is best for us, he knows that living with good morals and with correct behavior will actually make our life better. Maybe it isn't about living to please him, maybe it all goes back to how much he loves us and wants the best for us.

Life, Love and Trampolines

2008-07-31T13:47:00.000-07:00

I am an impetuous person. So far in my life I have held 4 career-type jobs and I am 34. I like to start new things, but I have a hard time finishing them (notice the last post is in March!). I am someone who likes change, but I am never satisfied with it.

We are on vacation and visiting my brother in Sexsmith, Alberta (you've heard of a goldsmith and a blacksmith...these guys work on something else here). They have a trampoline, this morning I noticed Nicky (my wife) lying on the trampoline soaking up the sun and I went and lay down beside her. We talked about life and love, and I really enjoyed the conversation.

I said, "I could live in a small town like this," and we went on to discuss my need for change and new challenges. The ensuing conversation challenged me to consider something that I have been learning over the last few months. I need to learn to be faithful in the things that I do, not to always look for something new, I need to be content in the life that I currently lead, not to always look for the greener grass on the other side. The former leads to loyalty, faithful friends, strong relationships. The latter could lead to something great as well, but I never want to sacrifice the former. I am making a change, a new commitment (old habits die hard) to the old things in my life...

A we were sort of wrapping up our conversation, our 3 year old Owen came running out of the house, yelling, "I'M GOING TO BOUNCE YOU GUYS!" and proceeded to jump all around us. A great game of tag, tickling, bouncing and laughing ensued between Nicky, Owen and I...I love the things that stay the same in my life!

Guitar Lessons

2008-03-25T08:33:00.000-07:00

I started taking guitar lessons a few weeks ago. I have been playing guitar for like 7 years, but after learning the basics 7 years ago I have never taken the time to practice, so I decided now was the time to learn some new stuff (plus Nicky gave me the time as a Christmas present...woohoo!).

So, I walk in to my first lesson in this tiny little studio and there is a young guy (maybe about 19-20) with long greasy hair, he is sitting there with his black electric guitar (with whiteout all over it and a few band stickers). He just kind of says hi and then plays a quick little solo (about 5 notes) on his guitar. His guitar is not plugged in so you can barely hear it. He says, "so today we basically (6 note solo) need to find out (8 note solo) where you are at (25 note solo)." So I start to tell him a little bit about where I am at, I show him a little on my guitar. He sits and listens, seeming antsy, when I am done, he plays a little solo on his guitar, and says, "OK, sooo (8 note solo - looks at the clock 20 mins left in the 30 minute lesson) what should we do now (strum, strum). Do you have any questions (5 note solo) for me?" I can't think of anything for a while, and there is this awkward silence, only broken by the odd 6-7 note solo from his unplugged electric guitar. I ask him, "so how did you get in to teaching guitar?" "Well (7 note solo), last summer my parents told me that I needed to either get a job or move out (strum strum), so I looked in the paper and saw this job (6 note solo), I like playing guitar so I applied and got it." "Oh," I say...this was comforting, because I really didn't want to be taught by someone who actually wanted to be there. The rest of the lesson went painfully long and slow and we never really did anything.

A week later, when it came time to go, I decided to give him another chance (actually, Nicky encouraged me to stick with him for at least one more lesson). This time he did have a bit of a plan and then the next week, he started teaching me what he called an old song from the 80s. You can't beat 80s music, especially for guitar. So, now I am rocking, "I Just Died in Your Arms Tonight" by the Cutting Crew, thanks to my new favourite guitar teacher. I am starting to see a real future with this guy, he's a great teacher...8 note solo (by me).

U2 3D

2008-03-12T10:31:00.000-07:00

What a great way to do a concert! I really enjoyed going to see U2 at the IMAX. I have never really enjoyed a concert as much as I did doing it this way. You totally felt like you were there, the sound quality was amazing the 3d made you feel like you could touch Bono and the crowd was lovin' it. Maybe it has something to do with the fact that basically all the concerts I go to I am going with a group of people that are at least 17 years younger then me, and apparently music has changed a little over the last 17 years. U2 would probably rank as my favourite (if I really had to choose) and I liked that they were trying to say something in the concert. One of the major themes was "Coexist." The "C" being the Islamic symbol of a moon, the "X" being Judaisms star of David and the "T" being the Christian symbol of a cross. Bono at one point sang the following lines:

Some graphitti was written up on a wall not too far from here
It says coexist
Jesus, Jew, Mohammed, it's true
Jesus, Jew, Mohammed, it's true
All sons of Abraham
Father Abraham, Father Abraham
Where are you now
Father Abraham, look what you've done
You've pitted your son against your son
Father, Father Abraham
No more, no more, no more
No more, no more, no more
No more, no more, no more
No more, no more

I have had a few discussions about this whole idea, a few people I talk to think that Bono is getting a little carried away and that his "Christian Theology" is wrong. That if he is a real Christian he wouldn't say that they are all equally right. My response is this...first of all, I am not sure that this is what Bono is saying, secondly, he is not trying to make a theological statement, he is trying to say that we should all get along and live together in peace. He is speaking to all of us who can learn better ways of solving our disagreements, or coexisting in spite of our disagreements. I totally agree with this.

The funny thing is that the people who created the "CoeXisT" symbol are now suing U2 for using it in their concert without permission. How ironic, a symbol meant to encourage harmony and peace is the centre of a litigation case.

Trevor the Terrific

2008-03-12T07:43:00.000-07:00

I did a little illusion in church on March 2nd, it created quite a stir, so I thought I would video tape it and show it to you here. The "child volunteer" is Mike Kiewitt, adult ministries pastor at our church.

Turning 34

2008-03-04T20:44:00.000-08:00

I have never been one to really care about my birthday, but this year I felt more celebrated then ever. It was actually quite enjoyable and did my ego well (or maybe not so good...if it was already too big). On Friday night we have our youth program and during my talk I mentioned that my birthday was tomorrow and there was a huge cheer from the crowd (I didn't even think they listened during my talks). Saturday, Nicky and I both got to sleep in because the kids were at my parents, then we went out for breakfast, came back home and had lunch with Nicky's parents who had just returned from Israel...it was so cool to hear what they got to do there, and to sense how much they really enjoyed it. Someday I want to go there myself! They left me a very awesome present, then I got to have a nap before we went out for supper. Having a sleep-in and a nap in the same day...that is like my ideal day! Then we went out to dinner and a movie with our friends Colin and Jodene (it was Jod's birthday on the 3rd - and we often get to celebrate together). We went to Hu's (an asian restaurant) and then to see U2 3D at the IMAX. That was a great time, I will have to post about that another day. After that we went out for coffee and closed down two different places. That day I also received a whole whack load of emails, facebook messages and phone calls. Sunday, I had another party at my parents with my Winnipeg family, and then on today (Tuesday) I was sitting in the office and all of the sudden a bunch of people are singing happy birthday to me and offering me the greatest cake ever...I don't know what you would call it but it was meringue, whipped cream, strawberries, blueberries and kiwi, mmmmmmmmm. I don't think my birthday has ever been recognized in this way, you all better be careful, I might get used to this!

It's Expensive to Help People

2008-02-26T20:20:00.001-08:00

This is the coverpage of the Free Press a while back:

This whole thing bothered me quite a bit and so I wrote a letter to the editor that went like this:

Dear Editor

When do we care about the homeless? When they make us
feel uncomfortable, or guilty. When do we decide that we should do something
about the situation? When we realize they are costing us money. This is a sad
reality of our culture. We are not concerned that there are 38 people who
obviously are in a very rough situation, who really need our help…we care that
they are costing us.

By presenting the story the way it was on the cover
of the Winnipeg Free Press, you are perpetuating this societal reality. The
result of the cover is that people will be angry with the homeless people who
are burdening us taxpayers. The reality is that we as a society have failed
these people. We have not provided them with the support they need to beat their
addictions. We have not distributed our resources in a way that helps them. I
know that the article (that was tucked away in section B) briefly discussed some
of these issues…but I believe the damage was done by having a cover that loudly
declares “How 38 street people are costing us millions” and breaking down all
the things that they do that cost us money. There are many great things that are
happening and that organizations are doing, there are things that work, and we
need to support those.

Gord Steeves says, “as a society we have an
obligation to get out there and make sure (these people) are forced into care.”
I disagree, instead I would say it like this:
as a society we have an
obligation to get out there and make sure these people know we care…not just
about OUR money.

Trevor Berg

As far as I know it didn't get published.

I am Getting Old!

2008-02-26T15:11:00.000-08:00

Not only will it be my 34th birthday making me feel old, but I also had the experience of feeling old this weekend at YouthQuake at Briercrest. They always bring in some great bands, and the bands they brought in this time were some of our groups favourites. Family Force 5 and Disciple. They were so pumped! I have listened to their music a little, but when it came time for the concert and the music started pumping out of the mass of speakers so loud that my pants shook because of the subwoofers, my head immediately began to ache and I kind of laughed to myself. The antics on stage were sort of comical to me. I got in there in the mosh pit and had a good time, but the thing that made me realize that I was getting old was that I really don't like the music that youth like anymore (sorry to any of my YQ friends that are reading this)! That doesn't really bother me though, I really appreciated that they were having a good time, so I did too. Here is a video of some of it (mostly I like the part near the end where I took the camera into the mosh pit) notice the awesome silver gloves on the lead singer:

What if it Were My Son on the Street

2008-01-31T13:08:00.000-08:00

I just started reading this book called The Truth about Social Justice. I think it is going to be amazing. The author talks about how we should advocate for people who are poor or on the margins of society, because they often don't have people looking out for them. This could perhaps include political advocacy, but could also include personal advocacy. Here is an example that came to mind for me:

If I had a son, who got addicted to drugs (I hope this does not happen, but it is not out of the realm of possibility given what kind of Father he has to live with). I would do my best to love him (probably with some tough love, and with some soft love) I would fight for him, I would strongly encourage him to quit, and I would do what I could to help him. If he decided he wanted to quit, I would probably help him out, probably paying for and supporting him in the time he needed in Rehab and whatever else he needed.

The problem is, that there are many people out there who do not have a father that would do this for them. They maybe want to quit, but don't have someone who will help them through that process.

I want to be able to be that person who advocates for those people, that person who is a father to the fatherless.

Just for Fun

2008-01-24T09:00:00.001-08:00

I was looking for some pictures and came across these ones instead.

ht: Jon Enns

No such thing as a Free Lunch?!

2008-01-22T07:53:00.000-08:00

A few weeks ago I decided to go to a downtown Winnipeg mission for lunch to try and understand what that is like and to get to know some people down there. I wrote a sort of journal entry that I wanted to share with all of you, here it is:

Just came back from am inner-city mission where I went “undercover” for a while. This morning during my morning prayer and reading time I decided that I should go there and pose as a customer in need of food and just sit around and visit with people.

This morning, I went outside, shoveled the driveway (big snow storm last night), got dressed in an old jacket and some older jeans, drove the boys to school, went to church, looked after a few emails, and took care of some other business and went to the downtown library to do some work on some talks I needed to prepare. All morning I was trying to talk myself out of going, so I had built in a little accountability. I told Nicky that I was going to do this, then at the office, I told Pastor Ron that I would as well.

I pulled my car into the underground garage at the downtown library and pulled out my laptop and palm pilot. I was going to work at the library until lunch was served at Siloam at 12:30. I worked on my talk for Friday night for a while, then, at 12:15, I got up to walk over to the mission. I stopped by at my car to drop off the computer, palm pilot and a few other things. I put my cell phone, wallet, and keys into my jacket pocket. I started walking over to the mission…it turns out that it is a pretty good walk and it was a cold windy day in Winnipeg.

I pulled up my hood over my head and tried to imagine what it would be like to get around on foot all the time…perhaps to be stuck out in these conditions at night…I couldn’t. I kept walking, I was getting close, when I looked at my Perry Ellis watch to see what time it was…oops, I’m an idiot, of course I should take my watch off! It would be a dead give away that I don’t belong there (I think?!). I continued walking and realized that I had my $200 glasses on as well…I decided to remove those. I walked in totally convinced that people would know right away that I lived in the suburbs…I walked up the stairs and at the top was a woman with a name tag and a bag of slips of paper. As I walked up to her, I noticed the person in front of me was given a piece of paper. I walked up to her and she looked at me and kind of stared for a second…I thought my cover was blown immediately! She says to me, “you here for a meal?” “Yes, please,” I reply. She points me to the back of the line.

I stand there feeling very out of place for a while, when all of the sudden a young guy walks up to the guy in front of me. “Hey, how’s it going?” They say loudly to each other. They start talking, the young guy says to his friend, “yeah, I’m sore, because I spent six hours at the gym yesterday, and I was working just the legs!” It seemed like a conversation that anyone in my world could have, so I started to feel a little more at ease.

As I got closer to the front of the line, I noticed that there was a camera crew from the CBC there and they were filming people going through the line. I thought to myself, “wouldn’t it be ironic if I end up on the news tonight!” I go through the line, I think the U of M Bisons were serving the food – that may explain the camera crew. I sit down with three other guys and just start eating, minding my own business. The same two young guys were talking, now it was a good story. Apparently young guy number 1 has a friend who is 4’8” and weighs 100 lbs. this guy knows dragon kickboxing and he got in a fight with a big 6 foot tall guy. He jumped up, kicked the guy in the head and the fight was over. I decided that I needed to take up dragon kickboxing, then maybe people would stop bothering me.

Fabian, the man next to me starts talking and looking at me, but he talks so softly that I could barely understand him. He says (I think), “you kidding me, don’t matter how strong you are, the streets can beat down anyone. I’ve been there.”

Young man #2 asks young man #1, “how come you ain’t eating?” He tells us that he is on some kind of medication that takes away his appetite. “I haven’t eaten in two days,” he says. I wonder if by medication he means some sort of street drugs. Young man #2 asks him to use his ticket to get him another plate of food, so he does.

Fabian says to young man # 1, “not eating, it does bad things to you, after a while you start to lose it. I know, I’ve been there.” I ask him what he means. He says, “One time I didn’t eat for a week, I wound up passed out down by the river frozen half to death, and someone found me and called the paramedics. I know, I’ve been there. I’m not proud of it, but I’ve been there.” “How did that happen?” I ask him. I think that he said something about a few of his friends or family who were killed and then he just had enough of life and decided to commit suicide. “So it was suicide?” I ask. “Yeah, I quit eating, would line up a bottle of beer a bottle of rye and pop some pills, day after day I did this, after a while I didn’t know what was happening and I wound up by the river.” “I have to go to the hospital, for surgery.” He pulls out a letter. “I don’t think that I’m going to go there. The chances are 80-20…80 for them 20 for me. I’m scared.” “I guess so.” I say. “What do you have?” “A tumor, back here,” Fabian says, pointing to the back of his head. “I got this letter from my sister, haven’t heard from her in 27 years. Her husband died last year, December 31st 2007.”

The topic changes again…he talks about how he was about to beat someone to a pulp last night because they had hit a woman, then a little later on that day he had just about beat someone else to a pulp because they wanted to bum a cigarette off him when he didn’t have one. Each time, a police car had come just as he was about to let loose on the guy. “I’m sorry,” he says. “I’ve just been talking away here.” “That’s OK,” I say, “I’m not much of a talker.” (OK, a bit of a lie, is that OK for a Pastor?) “More of a listener?” he asks.” “I guess so.”

I ask Fabian what his sister said in the letter…he hands it to me. “You can read it if you want.” I look it over, it is a horrible story of broken relationships. Her husband had died, she didn’t know what to do with herself, she moved in with a nephew. She wanted to support the family, she was back working at the Day’s Inn in Lethbridge. As I am reading Fabian keeps talking, “I don’t know why he took them away from me,” he says with bitterness. “My one boy when he was 5 the other when he was 17.” “Who took them away from you,” I ask. He points at the roof, “the good Lord.” He says in a way that makes me think he doesn’t actually think he is good. “That’s what led me to drink,” he says. I don’t know what to say...I say nothing. “It wasn’t them who had a bad temper, it was me, I deserved it, not them.” I still don’t know what to say.

"When was it that you didn't eat for a week?" I ask. "Two weeks ago," He says. This hits me like a tonne of bricks. Two weeks ago! I start noticing evidence of frostbite on his face and what looks like a nose that has been broken or seriously injured in some way. This guy is in rough shape.

The letter talks about how his sister had heard that he was in the hospital, “how was the surgery?” she asks. “Oh, I guess I should tell you that you are an uncle, Dom is 21, Maggie 14, Gord is 7 and Lori, the baby is 1. I am 56 years old now.”

Fabian eventually finishes, gets up, “I’m going to get a coffee, you want some?” “No thanks,” I say. He does not return to the table.

I talk with a few young guys who are talking about working tonight, they could have a job shoveling driveways all night. “It’s going to be -48 with the windchill tonight,” one guy says…”that’ll be f*%#ing cold at 4 in the morning,” the other says.

I talk with Dion for a while, I guess he hurt his hand last summer tying re bar for the Hydro building. He is on Methadone now, so that helps with the pain, so he doesn’t feel it too much, just at 6:30 in the morning it starts until he gets his methadone at 9:30. “Where do you get it?” I ask. “At the Shoppers on Portage,” he says. “Have you been around here much?” he says. “Nope, this is my first time,” I say. “I don’t come here much either, I try to stay away as much as I can.” I’m thinking that he prefers to fend for himself. “I like to go to this other place on Colony and Broadway. It’s a soup kitchen…you should check it out some time.” “I live at the McLaren, where do you live?” I hesitate… Dion saves me and says, “at the Shalom centre?” I let him believe that.

I suddenly realize I am wearing my wedding ring and become conscious that this might be a giveaway, I am extremely aware of it. “I’m trying to get off this methadone, I was addicted to morphine twice and went off that cold turkey, but you can’t do that with methadone…you have to do it gradually.” “The idea is that you get your life back together then slowly come off the stuff. I guess it’s ok, but I would just like to be off it.” “I would be in Calgary if it wasn’t for this stuff.” We talk for a while, and I eventually say, that I am going to get going. “Nice to meet you.”

I walk away, as I exit the building, I feel as though I am a different person, someone who understands just a little bit more, someone who can empathize a little better…but as I walk along I start to put things back on…first my watch to see what time it is...1:30…I was there less then an hour. Then I put my wallet back in my pants pocket – “I will lose it forever if I leave it in this jacket,” I say to myself. I pull out my cell phone to see if I missed any calls, I move my keys around. Each time I do one of these things, I slowly realize I am coming back to who I usually am…not who I actually am…the last hour I have been pretending to be someone I am not in order to gain some understanding, but I realize that I am always pretending to be someone I am not…I am just wearing a different mask now, one I am more comfortable with.

I am suddenly more bothered with people, people who talk about how annoyed they are that they have to scrape their windshields now, people who wear trendy facial hair and talk on their ear bud phones. Maybe I have become more who I actually am, the person that God intended me to be, maybe just a little.

God or Science??

2008-01-18T08:02:00.000-08:00

I was pointed to an interesting discussion by one of the youth in my Church (thanks Dustin)between a bunch of young people discussing whether God or Science is the answer. The discussion can be found here (if you have a Facebook account), but I will warn you there are 96 posts at the time I am publishing this. There are so many interesting comments, but I wanted to share with you a little of what happened.

This was the discussion starter:

i wondered...is science wrong???or is god wrong???i believe in god, but what i'm wondering, is that how come that science is more believable than god? whats the difference? (have pity i'm 14 years old) science was created by mankind... so how come mankind isn't wrong?we've been wrong before... tons of times hell we may even be wrong about everything...haha just realized science made computers...but still... we think the big bang made everything, and it did...it also made godBTW!!! god didn't make mankind... if you've been to church you'd realize that.one last thing before people start telling me i'm wrong with huge explantations and what not. the bible was written, science was also written, or learned, or w/eguess who wrote/taught both?mankind

From that a huge argument broke out about evolution vs. creation. Some of these people have done a LOT of homework on this subject and argue very well...both ways...by the end I was frustrated so here is what I wrote:

I think the issue here is not to prove who is right and who is wrong. When it comes to the beginning of the world (something that happened at least thousands of years ago), it is not possible to have hard evidence. I would agree with Cameron, that there are some significant things left unproven in the theory of evolution leaving some serious holes...that is why it is called a theory, it is based on some facts that have been tested in some ways, but it still takes faith to put your trust in that theory because some things don't seem to add up. I would agree with Arash in that it is also obvious that there are some things that are unproven in the creation story...it takes faith to put your trust in a God creating the earth. I don't think either is provable, so to a certain degree this argument is pointless, except to show that neither can be proven.I would suggest that Christians should concentrate more on the evidence that God is real in their own lives. If God is real in my life, according to the Bible, he should make a difference in the way I live my life and in how much I care for
people...I think there is plenty of evidence for that...the sad reality is that there is plenty of evidence to the contrary as well. I would suggest that Christians (of which I am one) should concentrate more on the evidence that can actually be seen...in the way I love and care for God's greatest creation, his people.

What do you think?

My Sermon on December 30th

2008-01-15T20:32:00.001-08:00

I preached at my church on Sunday. A couple people have asked about getting the mp3 of it...so here it is. DOWNLOAD FILE (just click on Request Download Link, then click on Download File) Basically I preached what I blogged here.

Generation Gap?

2007-12-29T11:48:00.000-08:00

A friend of mine recently put up this great blog. It is a conversation between an adult and a youth. It totally captures the generation gap that I see quite often. Check it out here.

The Little Drummer Boy Has Gas

2007-12-28T17:08:00.000-08:00

Owen, our 2 year old son, was singing a song the other day, that I was not able to recognize for the first while (he is 2 after all - and makes up most of the lyrics), but I really cracked up when he got to the chorus. All I could hear was, "hmmm, hmm, la, la, la, pa rumble bum bum." Fart jokes are always funny right?

The Inner-City Needs Friends

2007-12-28T13:32:00.000-08:00

Lately God has been tugging at my heart and challenging me to make my faith more alive, by loving people. He has specifically challenged me to be more aware of poverty in Winnipeg, he has also been challenging me to do something about it.
As I have shared this with people, many have responded and said that they have been receiving a similar challenge from God and I truly believe that God is at work in our Church and that he wants us to respond to the needs that we see (or that we ignore) everyday.

This will be a long post, but I wanted to be more specific about how God has been challenging me…

This summer, a hand injury gave me a chance to spend more specific time with God, and during that time God began to challenge me with very heavy (not easy) stuff for me. Over the last few years I have often felt the need to challenge our church to be more of a help to people who live in poverty…I often felt that our church has been blessed with many financial blessings and that we could be doing more with those blessings. As I read the Bible and other books during my time with God I found that he was challenging me specifically. I didn’t hear a voice per se, but I knew God was saying to me (through his word and other people), “You think your church isn’t doing enough to help the needy, but what about you? You don’t even know your neighbors well enough to know if they are in need.” This was a very strong challenge to me, and one that has been at work in my heart over the last few months. Lately as I do my Bible reading I actually try to avoid passages that talk about poverty, but it always seems that God speaks to me about it through every passage I read, and through many of the experiences that I have. I have also come to a few discoveries that I believe are significant (at least for me)

I saw how much money our church easily able to raise to send a large group of people to Cambodia to help with poverty there. This was an important thing for us to do, but I often felt challenged to be doing more here as well, poverty is not ONLY far away, it is around the corner.
The story of the Good Samaritan (Luke 10:25-37) helped me to realize that Jesus may have been saying something about learning from people that we normally look down upon. Jewish people normally looked down upon Samaritans (I look down on inner-city homeless). I was challenged to see that I have something to learn from people I normally look down upon. This was confirmed for me when I visited a young lady who works with inner-city children. She said, “I used to think that I would bring Jesus to the people of the inner-city, now I realize that when I came to bring them Jesus, I found out that he was already there.” I think that middle class people need to get to know people who live in poverty, otherwise there is no way we can learn from them, nor can we help them.
I have separated the two greatest commandments at times. Jesus said that we should love God and love others (Luke 10:27)…and yet I often just want to love God…so I believe all the right things, I behave in the appropriate ways (I don’t smoke, don’t drink, don’t sin – well OK as best I can), and try not to do things that will hurt God, but I think if we live like that we are missing a huge part of what it means to be a Christian…our faith may actually be dead. I believe it is also very important to love people, especially the needy, this is a demonstration of our love for God (Sheep and the Goats).
The book of Philemon taught me about being a mediator. A mediator between those in need and those who have. It would probably be simplest for me to just start volunteering at a soup kitchen downtown or do something like that, but it is important for me to challenge others as I have been challenged, and I think some of you need to come along with me on this journey of helping people.
So far I have gone to visit a few of the downtown ministries that have caught my attention. I have been to Union Gospel Mission, Siloam Mission, LBE, and Inner-City Youth Alive – I am planning to get together with a representative from Love Lives Here as well. I have done some other research on the internet and through information that people have given me on other ministries. I have grown increasingly aware that there is a strong Christian presence in the downtown core and there are a lot of GREAT things going on there. They are seriously in need of volunteers, and need help to run the things that they do. They also could use help with some new dreams and goals, which I can share with you another time.

The plans I have are very limited, but here they are...

Right now, I believe that I need to spend time getting to know people in need. I can’t help them well if I really don’t know them and what their need is. I had lunch last week at Siloam Mission and just sat and talked with people…it was very eye opening.
I plan on getting involved in one or some of the inner-city ministries, and to just get a chance to interact with the people from the inner-city.
I plan to speak about this calling on December 30th (I am preaching that day)
I plan on bringing together a group of people together to talk about what we as a church can do to make our faith live and be active – Sunday, January 13th at 6:30pm

Here are a few questions for you:

Has God been challenging you in this way? If so let us know your story.
What can individuals do to get to know inner-city people?
What do you plan to do?

My Friends Rock

2007-12-21T18:15:00.000-08:00

We had a party at our place the other night for the volunteers that I work with. It is always a great time when we get together, but this time was a particularly good one for me. It wasn't that we did something special or had an amazing time it is just that I realized how much I appreciate the people who volunteer their time to work with me. I realize that this is not an easy endeavor (working with me can't be!), I also realize that they sacrifice a lot in order to give to the young people in our church. They also take the time to connect with our kids and that really means a lot to me. I really appreciate the way they encourage me and even hold me accountable on stuff. The people I work with are just great people who care, and are fun to be around. How can I express my appreciation? Word's do not come easily, but emotion does.
Thank you to all of you:
Matt and Andie
Graham
Danae
Jason and Pamela
Jeff
Andrea
Quinn
Lyla
Chi
Jordan
Phil
Tanis
Wes and Ashley
Andre and Roberta
Lucy
Geoffrey
Nathan
Kevin
Duncan
Jer and Ang
Colin and Jodene
Carol
Jeremy

These people seriously rock! I love you all!

Pepsi Sucks

2007-12-14T07:32:00.000-08:00

I, with the help of my friend Stephen (thanks Stephen), was moving my desk to the other corner in my office - to make it more homey :). I had my computer on the desk and a bunch of other stuff. In the process I knocked over a small computer speaker (weighing about 1/8 of a pound), it fell about 3 inches, landed on the side of a Pepsi can. I hear a loud POP! almost like a gunshot, and all of the sudden there is Pepsi everywhere. Because of this experience I have come to the conclusion that PEPSI SUCKS...for two reasons:

The taste is terrible - if it actually tasted good it wouldn't have been sitting on my desk in the first place, it would be in my belly. Somebody left this can on my desk months ago, and I haven't taken the time to drink it.

Obviously the quality of their cans leaves something to be desired - I know let's put something that can dissolve a nail in a month, put it under pressure in a thin aluminum can...this should be fun

Turn your cell phones off in church!

2007-12-11T13:36:00.000-08:00

A preacher is speaking on Love and someone's cell phone rings...what follows made me laugh for a long time! Check it out...it's only a minute.

Freaking Cold in our Office

2007-12-10T08:14:00.001-08:00

Thursday morning I came into the office to see Debbie sitting at her desk wearing her jacket and gloves. I thought, "I guess she just got here and hasn't taken her jacket off yet." I went into my office, took off my jacket and realized that she had it on for a reason...it was 12 degrees Celsius in there! That's 53 fahrenheit for my metrically challenged friends. The furnace had quit blowing heat over night and had been blowing -25 degree air into our office area for who knows how long. We sat in that office...wearing gloves at our computers all morning before the furnace was fixed at 12:30. I took a picture of myself just to show you how cold it was.

Should I Bring Jesus to the Poor?

2007-12-06T11:00:00.000-08:00

I met this young lady who works for an inner city organization that works with children. She has been working there for 10 years. She said one thing in particular that really struck me. She said, "I used to think that when I came to the inner city to work with these kids that I would bring Jesus to them, but when I got here and started working with them, I started to realize that Jesus was already here."
It struck me because I think that we middle class people (not just Christians) think that we should go into the inner-city and "rescue" people from their situation. We often feel as though we have all the answers and they have everything wrong. Is it possible that it is the other way around? Is it possible that people who live on the streets...those who don't worry about tomorrow, those who are not obsessed with money or material possessions actually have something to teach us? I think so.
So in response to the question, "Should I bring Jesus to the poor?" My answer would be a resounding, "NO!" Jesus is already there, let's go and find him, let's walk alongside people, maybe I have something I can offer them, maybe they have something they can offer me...we can learn from one another.

Check out the story of the Good Samaritan or the Sheep and the Goats from the bible for more on what has driven my thoughts on this. I think that by telling the Good Samaritan story, Jesus was saying something like, "those people you hate and look down on - the Samaritans - have something to teach you."

Winfield H. Tutte

2007-12-03T11:08:00.000-08:00

I went to a convention in St. Louis a few weeks ago. It was a convention for Youth Workers all over North America. There were 3500 other youth workers there, and it was a blast! I went two years ago, and am still inspired by what I saw, heard and learned there. The best part is just making connections. This year I actually got an email that I wrote to be read in the general session, here's the story:

Nicky and I were reading through the information that was given to us at the convention that explained what all the seminars were, there were 12 options for every time slot and it made for difficult decisions on where to go and where not to go. One particular presenter caught my eye, his name was Winfield H. Tutte, here's his bio (as quoted from the National Youth Workers Convention 2007 booklet):

H. Winfield Tutte
"Windiddy," as he's known to his friends, has a PhD, BVD, DVD and YWAM. He's a world-renowned youth worker, writer, speaker, plumber, gymnast, zoologist, and Amway "Double Diamond Super Rich Czar." Part of his amazing testimony inludes being raised by a pack of wolves who taught him his amazing ability to scratch himself (and others) with his feet. He's traveled across Rhode Island and back again with spiritual giants like Ron Luce, Borat, Billy Graham, Bono, the late Mister Rogers, and David Crowder. And he's currently working with Lindsey Lohan and Paris Hilton on a curriculum about decision making for teenage girls.

Seminars (location):

Casting Out Demons with a Light Fly rod (Renaissance Hotel Pool)
Teaching Teenage Boys How to Kick the Crap out of Non-Christians (2nd Floor guys Bathroom)
Staying Ahead of Culture: Dazzling Teens with 3-D Flannelgraphing (IMAX Theatre)
Making Square Dancing Christian (The Peek-a-Boo Lounge)
How to Make Your Students Believe They're Having a Good Time Whey They Really Aren't - free Kool-Aid to the first 25 who show up! (The Jones Memorial Carpet Room)
Helping Home-Schooled Kids Catch a Freakin' Clue (The Family Room)

It took a while for me to clue in that these were a total joke...I have to explain, there are a lot of jokes throughout all the information that we get for all these things. So, I knew that there were a lot of jokes going on here, but I wasn't sure if there actually would be seminars in the places and times that they were advertised for...until Nicky said, "of course it's a joke, you idiot!" Why wife she's real smart.

I decided to write an email to Tic Long and Mark Oestreicher just to have some fun with the whole thing...this is what I wrote and then their responses:

-----Original Message-----Sent: Sunday, November 04, 2007 06:08 PM Eastern Standard Time To: Oestreicher, Mark

Subject: Got beat up by H. Winfield Tutte

Marko,I have to say that I am somewhat frustrated...I come from a small city in Canada all the way down here to St. Louis and have had a horrible experience. In my youth group I have been really encouraging the young people to be "different" to stand out and be unique...not to worry when persecution comes, but to face it head on. Well lately my teenage boys have been getting beat up at school because of how great they are and the way that they follow my instructions. I am proud of them, but wanted to help. When I saw H. Winfield Tutte's seminar entitled "teaching teenage boys how to kick the crap out of non-christians" I was very excited, now I could actually give them something that they could really use...talk about being practical! I showed up in the guys 2nd floor washroom @ 7:55 and was disappointed to see that there was no one there, I waited a while and eventually a man walked in that I thought looked a lot like H. Winfield Tutte's picture in the brochure...you know, he had a mustache, a large belt buckle, a big tattoo and was approximately 6'3" and 275. My heart beat with anticipation, finally I would be able to teach my kids something. I stood there and waited...he just walked past and visited the urinal...he washed his hands and walked past me and kind of looked at me wierd. He was about to leave when I said (you can understand the frustrated tone) "Hey, buddy, are we going to get this thing started?" He answered back, in a none too friendly tone, "What are you talking about?!" I said, "you know the fighting thing." I don't know if he misunderstood me, but I don't remember what happened next but I woke up at 11:00am on the floor of bathroom stall, my hair was wet and my head hurt bad. I don't know who you get in to do these things, but, seriously, you should check them out a little more carefully.

Frustrated...and hurt...Trevor Berg

Later I received a response:

From: Oestreicher, Mark

Sent: Monday, November 05, 2007 4:31 PM

Dude, you really had me going for a bit on this one!Mark OestreicherPresidentYouth Specialties

Then again another response:

From: Long, Tic

Sent: Wednesday, November 07, 2007 11:32 AM RE: Got beat up by H. Winfield Tutte

Dude that is awesome. BTW I don’t know if you were still there but I read you letter in the last general session….classic. Keep us informed on your journey…tic

One of the things I love about this convention is their willingness to have fun and to make fun of themselves.

I took my mustache on the road!

2007-12-01T22:02:00.000-08:00

Before the mustache contest came to a close my lovely wife and I decided we should take my mustache on the road and let it see the world before it met a decidedly sharp and painful end.
So we hopped in a rental car and took it to St. Louis

A picture of the 3 of us...Nicky, me and my mustacheMy mustache saw the sights

And even met celebrities (that's Jar's of Clay mere metres away from my mustache!)
That's David Crowder's back! (You probably don't even know who he is)

Here is a picture of David Crowder on the big screen...we (my mustache and I) never got to see him for real from the front.
Much of the trip was filled with frivolity, but...
Some of it stunk.Sometimes people even made fun of me, and laughed and called me names

But overall it was well worth it

When it came down to judging the contest I wound up finishing second in the contest to the fellow sitting next to me, but I believe shaving your head bald (did you have to shave? or is it natural?) and growing handlebars is sort of like cheating! Doesn't really matter though, because my mustache and I, we enjoyed ourselves.

A Message for Pastor Mike

2007-11-29T14:46:00.000-08:00

The Snow Does Not Go Away!

Pastor Mike (a guy I work with) moved from the the lower mainland of BC this spring. He now lives in Winnipeg, after having never been farther east then Kenora in his life. He is uneducated about our weather, which at this time of year could be described as "crisp." It seems like every day he comes in to the office with what is for him a new revelation, and what is for us the reality of living in cold weather every winter for all of our lives. Here are his revelations:

excitedly, "I had frost on the INSIDE of my windshield this morning, wow!"
"It's so great, my car spun out in the parking lot!"
After I made a comment that we won't see the ground for a while..."this snow will melt won't it? Are you telling me this snow won't melt? Don't you guys get any chinooks or warm weather or anything?"

Mike...the snow will be here at least until march, get used to it!

God is Really Difficult

2007-11-28T14:12:00.000-08:00

I have been taking a break from blogging over the last couple months or so. I really enjoy blogging (it works like therapy for me), but I have found that I have been dealing with some really heavy issues the last while and have decided to not make it a priority. I guess now I realize that I really need the therapy.

A while ago I wrote a post entitled Bathing For Jesus, where I described how I have enjoyed reading and praying in the bath. The truth is that since I have started doing that the impact has been devastating. I know that God is a loving God and loves me, but it seems like he keeps hitting me over the head with his love. I feel like God is saying, "I love you so much, and I have also given you many things, many advantages in life." Then it seems like he is saying, "I love a lot of other people also, people who do not have the things you do, people who do not have the advantages you have...I gave you those things so that you would share what I have given you with those who do not have them...I have chosen you to love those people with what I have given you...I have chosen to love those people through you." This may not seem all that heavy, but for me it has been. For me I think that it means that I need to start getting to know what the issues of poverty are in my city, for me it means that I need to start doing something to learn from those people who suffer in poverty, for me it means that I need to start sharing some of the things I have (or maybe sacrificing some of the things I don't want to let go), for me it means I need to start living in a way that shows that I love people who live in poverty, not just the suburban people I come in contact with every day, for me it means I need to spend time getting to know those people, for me it means sacrificing time, money and energy doing things for other people then myself, for me it means attempting to inspire others to do the same, for me it means the potential of exposing my family to things that are outside of my comfort zone, to me it means PICKING UP MY CROSS and following Jesus, and that cross seems very heavy right now!

Google Me

2007-10-16T09:01:00.000-07:00

I have this thing called Site Meter at the bottom of my blog. It keeps track of how many people have visited my blog (because I am a numbers person)...it also keeps track of how people got to my site. So I can track where people are getting referred from. Usually it doesn't know where you come from, but sometimes it shows me that people got there from someone else's blog who has a link to mine, or that they got there from my facebook page, or whatever. But every once in a while it will show that people got here from a google search or some other search engine. I have pulled out a few of my favourites just to show you (by the way you can see all the same things as I can by just clicking on the SiteMeter icon at the bottom of this page).

People are most often referred to my blog by google when they search information on Ice Bergs, but they have also been referred to my blog when they punched the following things into google (these are direct quotes):

unexplained swelling of both hands
orange puss coming from hands
songs played on chvn radio station on september 28
schmaunt kuchen
hate socks
mustache growing contest
why does ice get on the inside of my windshield?
ice bathing
how many kill romance
"ron luce"
Things to do when you have one arm

I hope I have been of great help and service to these people!

Mustachio

2007-10-16T08:47:00.000-07:00

I have entered the dark underworld of a mustache growing contest, having been drawn in by Nicky's (my wife's) brothers. This is a picture of how put together I looked without a mustache. If you look at the picture below, it would seem that the mustache itself has gotten to me. I am not saying that growing a mustache means you become a drunk, sleazy, stuck in the 80s, trying-to-be-young-but-not-being-successful-at-it type of person, but that is what it has done to me. I find that when I walk I have a different gait, one that I tried to use back in Jr. High...to look cool. I find that I have a renewed passion for wearing hi-top shoes with the laces undone. I have a need to wear bright coloured clothing, and I have been looking for acid-wash pants at Value Village (unsuccesfully).

The thing is that I also have many good friends who are growing mustaches, and have had mustaches for a long period of time, it doesn't seem to have this kind of impact on them.

I work at a church, and therefore, I am exposed to many different people...all of whom are my boss to some degree. I find the need to explain as often as possible that I am in a mustache growing contest - especially to those who are younger than me. The youth at church think it is horrible, they think that it makes me look like a greasy guy, they question my sanity - that I would even consider getting involved in such a contest calls for such a question in their mind. Then, when I am around the 40 plus crowd - you know the demographic that per capita has the largest percentage of upper lip hair growth - I am very uncomfortable. I am not trying to insult those people by growing a mustache, or by making fun of myself while doing it, but it certainly could be taken that way. Maybe they think I am being disrespectful, I hope that I am not, but I power on and soon I will be the champion of the mustache growing contest...then what will all the nay-sayers say...

Christian Paradoxes

2007-10-12T13:21:00.000-07:00

Talking about how much I love people on my cell phone - while giving the finger to other drivers (who are so stupid), wearing gap jeans, listening to ripped music, on my cheap "made in china" MP3 player, driving a huge gas guzzling SUV, on my way to a $25 movie (I need popcorn) about the Blood Diamonds (crazy how rich people take advantage of the poor), drinking a $5 Red Bull, and wearing a Cambodian made T-Shirt (The children in Cambodia need my support, otherwise they will never be able to keep their "jobs.")

Anything else?

Love

2007-10-03T13:00:00.000-07:00

I think we all misunderstand love...I spoke about love this last Friday at a youth event. I was talking about how great God's love is for us. How he loves us even though he knows all the crap that is in our lives. Do we truly get how much he loves us? Can we ever understand that?

I don't think I could ever be like Jesus...you know, die for someone who hates me or is actively doing things against me. If I can't be like that, can I really understand the love that he has for me? But, I really think that if we actually do understand his love for us, it will revolutionize the way that we live our life, the way that we experience life, and the way that we view life. Until we do understand God's love (and I do think that it is possible to), and allow ourselves to experience God's love, we can not live life to the full, neither can we love other people in the way that we should.

Romans 5:8 (New International Version)
8But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.

Help!

2007-10-02T09:56:00.000-07:00

This is the group of people I work with...I need some help! I come to the office everyday and these are the people I encounter. They are not normal, they are crazy! I do not fit in at all.

Actually I really enjoy working with these people they have been inspiring to me and a lot of fun to be around. I hope that others of you get to work with people like this. It is great to go to the church everyday. Below are just the Pastor's...I obviously carry a deep respect for them!

I Hate Socks

2007-09-19T07:51:00.000-07:00

I have always had a disdain for wearing socks...however, I do live in Winnipeg and there is the occassional need for them - sandals are uncomfortable in -30 degrees celsius. I go with sandals as long as possible. My son Ben though, he has a whole different level of hatred for socks. He is just starting grade 1 and is slowly adjusting to being at school all day. He is a very social kid though and really seems to like school. He had been going a week and a half and we decided that we would go to Boissevain for Nicky's Dad's 70th birthday, this meant that Ben would miss school on Monday. As we were driving back we asked him if he was sad that he missed school that day...his face lit up and he said, "Nooo, I didn't have to wear socks all day! My feet weren't hot." Of all the reasons not to like school the only one that sticks out to him is the fact that he has to wear socks and his feet are hot. He is suffering...I know how he feels.

Radical Change - Does it Happen?

2007-09-07T10:16:00.000-07:00

I know radical change does happen, I have seen it. People who change their lives in a moment and it lasts a lifetime. Alcoholics who choose not to drink one day, and never touch a drop the rest of their lives. People, like Zaccheus in the Bible, who are thieves one day and generous givers after an encounter that changes their life. But, I think that this is not the normal way that people change, or the way that God changes people most times. I think change takes time. Sometimes we sit around waiting for God to strike us with lightning or "give us a sign" or a huge experience that forces us to change who we are, and most of the time, that does not happen...and so we are waiting for...nothing. Change is gradual, it is often quiet. If I wished that I was a great hockey player I wouldn't expect to become that after learning how to skate one day, but it seems like if I want to become a great person or Christian I expect myself to change overnight into that person. I have to accept that I know that I am not who I ought to be, but that's OK, I will slowly work at becoming better...please have patience with me, and I guess I will with you.

Personality

2007-09-05T08:52:00.000-07:00

My friend dale had this personality test posted on his blog...I thought I would try it out.
ApparentlyI am extremely intuitive and not sensing at all.
They describe my personality type as this:

ENFP - The "Advocate"
Myers-Briggs Personality Types (Free Test)
ENFPs are introspective, values-oriented, inspiring, social and extremely expressive. They actively send their thoughts and ideas out into the world as a way to bring attention to what they feel to be important, which often has to do with ethics and current events. ENFPs are natural advocates, attracting people to themselves and their cause with excellent people skills, warmth, energy and positivity. ENFPs are described as creative, resourceful, assertive, spontaneous, life-loving, charismatic, passionate and experimental.

This is way more positive then is realistic, sounds more like what I wish I was then what I actually am.

Being a "Safe" Christian

2007-09-03T12:27:00.000-07:00

I was listening to CHVN (the Christian radio station in Winnipeg) for a little while the other day and I got really angry. I have always been bothered by their slogan which says, "CHVN, safe and fun for the whole family." That morning the DeeJay was introducing a song and said something like, "now here is Michael W. Smith with Friends on CHVN...SAFE!" and the music kicked in (I don't actually remember the name of the song) He emphasized the word safe as if it was some profound word that stated what the station was all about. I worry about that, since I believe that Christianity is a lot of things, the least of which is safe. We try to make it safe, but...I don't think Jesus intended for following him to be a safe practice...He died for it after all...that doesn't sound safe...Jesus asked us to take up our cross (an ancient capitol punishment tool) and follow him...that doesn't sound safe. I try to make Christianity safe, by shielding myself from the real world, but it was never intended to be that way. Shame on me.

I have been reading Shane Claiborne's book called "the Irresistible Revolution" and he talks about how giving our life to Christ actually ruins it, because the demands on our life and the way we live it become extremely difficult. He asks us to love people as he loved us...does that mean we die for them...even when they don't like us and maybe even hate us? Sounds like what Jesus did.

Bathing for Jesus

2007-09-01T21:55:00.000-07:00

This post is not some weird theology on baptism...it is just that lately I have begun to understand the allure of bathing over showering. During the time when I had my hand bandaged, I was not supposed to get it wet and so baths were the easiest thing to do, the practice has continued over the last while though. I really enjoy a number of things about bathing. I love that I can take as long as I want and I won't use any more water...I love that I can read while I get clean...I love that it is a private time where I am alone and can be immersed in my thoughts (so to speak). I have been using the time in the bath tub to read the Bible or some sort of spiritually encouraging book and just talk to God about the day, some of my friends and how I can become more like Jesus. It has become the best part of my day...so bring on the bath salts, the bubble bath and the candles...I am bathing for Jesus!

Difficult Things to do With One Arm

2007-08-29T22:35:00.000-07:00

(especially your off arm)

Tie shoes
Put on socks
Get your keys out of your right hand pocket
Light matches
Type
Put peanut butter on toast
Chop vegetables
Wash dishes
Carry anything large, like a laundry basket
Open pill bottles
Preach (a small music stand, a large Bible and a fan blowing papers around all become huge factors)
Dress a two year old
Change a two year old's crappy diaper

I was able to accomplish all of the above at least once.

Cut meat (my friend Colin did this for me once at a restaurant - we got some interesting looks)
Grind pepper
Hold a new born baby
Shake hands properly

I was unable to accomplish any of the above.

Broken Hand - And I didn't even hit anyone!

2007-08-28T22:03:00.000-07:00

I have been absent from posting for a few weeks mostly for one reason. I broke my hand. I know, I know it is possible to type with one hand...but I found it incredibly frustrating to do so, I can't stand hunting and pecking! Especially with my left hand.
How did I injure my hand? I am glad you asked, since I have only told the story about 1000 times in the last two weeks, so you are lucky number 1001. I was in Pinawa at some natural waterslides close to the old Pinawa Dam(n!). I was there with a bunch of youth leaders as part of a leadership retreat that we were doing. We were having a great time going down the rapids on the (relatively?!) smooth rocks for about 45 minutes. My friend Jason and I decided that it would be a great idea to go down on a tube, together. My friend Matt held the tube for us as we got on and released us down the rapids (I mention names here because there is a pending lawsuit, and I am still not sure who is at fault...Jason for rolling off the tube onto me...or Matt for releasing us into the wrong part of the river...I will not consider the option that I may be at fault in any way shape or form). As we went over a drop-off (just on the right out of sight behind the tree), we began to rollover and Jason landed on top of me with my hand holding the weight of both of us as it got dragged over some "smooth" rocks. When I came out of the water I could almost see around a bone just below the knuckle on my right hand. Since I had said (as we came to the waterslides), "we won't leave until someone gets injured." We decided that this was the time to leave. We went to the hospital where my hand got stitched up and I was given an antibiotic in case of infection. This happened on Saturday...the next few nights (at the retreat and later at home) I couldn't sleep because the pain was so bad, so I went to the Doctor on Monday. That Doctor said, "oh, the Doctor in Pinawa gave you the wrong antibiotic, you have a serious infection, take this antibiotic and come see me on Wednesday." Oh, yeah he also did x-rays and found I had two broken fingers. I spent the next two days in even more pain then before and went back on Wednesday. At which point he looked at my hand and said, "oooh, that is not good...we are going to have to take out your stitches and let the infection out." So he did, then he took a knife, dug it into my hand to open the wound up more, then he began pushing on my hand with both his hands and what seemed like all his weight. This beautiful(?!) orange puss started coming out by the tablespoonful (I would guess about 5 tablespoons). Then he took a long Q-tip type thing and sticks it into the wound on my finger and starts sliding it in about an inch and a half under my skin to loosen up the infection. I don't think I have ever experienced that much pain before. As he is doing this he says, "we are going to need to do this every day for a while." I looked at him, between my heavy breathing, sweating and silent screams and said, "you expect me to come back every day to go through this?"

Since that day my hand has improved a lot though and I am now typing with it (they decided not to cast the broken fingers). I am doing physio and gaining motion in the middle and ring finger of my right hand.

One of the great things about me is that I have this disease (syndrome?) that is called urticharia, which is a latin word that means "unexplained swelling," (now that is a great diagnosis if I've ever heard one!). The thing is when I get sick, or my immune system is busy with something else, I always get really swollen. It makes for some enjoyable pictures, here is what I looked like during the worst of the infection, my eyes, mouth chin and cheeks were nicely swollen:

Mennonite Beer and Dancing

2007-08-09T11:47:00.000-07:00

Folklorama is an event in Winnipeg where you will come to learn that there are basically four parts to a culture - music, food, alcohol and dancing. There could be a little more to culture then that, but since I have now been indoctrinated into Folklorama-ism, that is what I have now come to believe.

The last couple of days I have been attending with Nicky and then with Owen and Hannah last night. It is a great festival where countries or cultures put on a show in various pavilions around Winnipeg. Each evening, you could go to 3 different pavilions and take in their culture for an hour.
If I were to label myself a specific culture, I would call myself a Mennonite - of course my Dad would say that Mennonite is "not a culture, it is a denomination." Anyway, in the Mennonite "culture" we have great music, the best food (hello wareneki, sausage and schmaunt fat or roll kuchen and watermelon...mmmm...), but we have no alcohol or dancing - both lead to sex, which is the ultimate sin. When I watched the Brazilians and the Africans dancing or the celtic river dancers I began to wish that I had grown up with dancing. My kids were right into the dancing and just eating it up, and they do some things that could be mistaken for dancing, but the other day we were watching a dance lesson on TV and my kids were trying to do it. I got up to join them and Ben said, "Daa-aad, you don't need to practice, you already are a good dancer." I realized at that point that my kids have no idea what good dancing is, or maybe even what dancing is! My awkward, skinny, white boy, mennonite, almost on the beat or in the groove joint creaking movements have now been described as "good dancing!" I would love to move to the music naturally, but I have to focus on listening to it and I am a very poor multi-tasker so I can't listen and move at the same time! I can't even clap when I'm singing or I lose my place in the lyrics. Good dancer, indeed!
I guess I wish that I had learned or been shown how to dance properly, it seems like a real natural expression of what the music is doing in people, but for me it looks like I've swallowed something I shouldn't have and can't figure out which end it should come out. I wish I could express what music does in me in that way, I think it would be a cool way to worship God, but it probably will never happen for me. Is it the same for any other mennonites out there?
I will tackle the alcohol issue another time, my brain is tired from trying to type and think at the same time.

I Care!

2007-08-07T10:27:00.000-07:00

I was reading my friend Phil's blog on the news and what is going on these days...the bridge in Minneapolis...Floods in India, Bangladesh and Nepal...and Christian aid workers taken hostage in Korea. I was convicted, because my post on the news (Minneapolis - Cambodia) was more critical of the media and the response to all the situations as opposed to caring about people. Sometimes I get too caught up in how things are done instead of how I care about people. These are horrible things that are going on that are affecting real people. I don't know how to respond to these things, but I want the first response to be care for the people.

One day Jesus saw a huge crowd, they were a crowd that was not doing well, many were sick, many needed help, "When he saw the crowds, he had compassion on them, because they were harassed and helpless, like sheep without a shepherd. Then he said to his disciples, 'The harvest is plentiful but the workers are few. Ask the Lord of the harvest, therefore, to send out worker's into his harvest field.'" (Matt. 9:36-38 - NIV)

Jesus first response was compassion, his second response was to pray, but to pray for people who would do something. I want to respond to the news of today like Jesus did to the news of his day - with compassion, and with an unquenchable thirst for something to be done.

Minneapolis - Cambodia

2007-08-06T22:15:00.000-07:00

This week I was struck by two news stories, one that received a lot of attention, another that will/has received very little. There's the incredible (awful!) story of the bridge that fell in Minneapolis where 5 have been confirmed dead and 8 are still missing. Then there is the story of the trials in Cambodia where they are trying the men who are responsible for the death nearly 2 million people in the late 70's. I don't mean to devalue the tragedy that went on in Minneapolis, but I would assume that many times the news coverage, and many times the financial resources will go to helping the victims and to help with the rebuilding, then has gone to the situation in Cambodia (or to other situations in Africa or Southeast Asia). I know that the USA is the power in the world today and they will, of course, look after their own first, I just wish that there was a little more equality. What can we do to make things a little more equal?

Questions, Questions

2007-08-05T23:59:00.000-07:00

I preached today at Church. I was talking about questioning God...I wound up looking up a bunch of stupid questions just for fun, I picked a few that I liked that I was unable to use. I hope you enjoy the questions:

You know the signs on restaurant doors? No Shirt, No Shoes, No Service? what if someone goes in with No Pants? Would the restaurant still have to serve them?
Why do we sing "Rock a bye baby" to lull our little ones to sleep when the song is about putting your baby in a tree and letting the wind crash the cradle to the ground?
Why do sleeping pills have warning labels that state :'Caution: May Cause Drowsiness?
Do nudists have pin-ups of people with clothes on?
Do people who use sign language see little hands in their head when they think about what somebody said, or do they hear the words in their head?
Why are the adjectives 'fast as' and 'slow as' often used in conjunction with hell, is hell slow or fast?
Could someone be addicted to counseling? If so, how would you treat them?
Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?
Is eating a mermaid considered cannibalism?
Why does it say do not use before work with heavy machinery on the back of childrens tylenol?
Why is it written "May contain traces of peanuts or other kind of nuts" on peanut butter jars.
Did Yankee Doodle name the feather, hat, town, or his pony Macaroni?
Why is it that people duck in the rain, do they really think the rain won't hit them?
Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds?

I found these here.

Facebook...Privacy

2007-08-01T12:32:00.000-07:00

Earlier this week I had some good discussions with some friends about what people put on the internet, and how it seems that people are willing to put some really private and personal information out there for people to read. It is kind of an odd thing, this internet world, we put our diaries online and call them blogs, we put our personal conversations for all to see on our wall's on facebook. I've read about people talking about how they got away with slacking off at work, and you can see many pictures of people that do not portray them in a positive light.
Today, I read a story about Facebook that I thought brings this all to a new level. We can get this false sense of security and suppose that our information is safe, but according to this story, after a glitch in Facebook's programming "some users said that after logging on to their Facebook accounts they could access other people's accounts as well as their mail. As well, some people said they were getting messages intended for other users." A little sketchy, but, considering what some people put out there for all to see, maybe it doesn't matter to any more.

Vandals

2007-07-30T13:56:00.000-07:00

Just got back inside from cleaning up some vandalism to our Church bus. This is not an unusual thing, in fact, when I think about it I can list a few of the vandalism acts that stick out in my mind over the last 3 years:

people spinning out their vehicles on the Church lawn (probably about 5 times - and usually when the grass is wet and soft, leaving great ruts)
100's of people spinning out in the parking lot (especially the pastors) but one in particular that apparently lost control and crashed into the bus.
Paintballing of the bus
throwing rocks at the parking lot lights
graffitti on the bus - my personal favorite because they crossed out "evangelical" and wrote "penis" so the decal then read "Winnipeg Penis Free Church."
Smashed beer bottles in the parking lot - quite often
Apparently last thurs. some kids were on the church yard on their knees while the police handcuffed them for "causing a nuisance" ...still not sure what that was.

This time someone had thrown eggs at the bus and broke into the bus and had a couple beers inside (apparently without a bottle opener, since the tops were broken off). I had to clean off the egg from the windshield and the back window - which takes some effort. For some reason this one ticked me off more then others. As I was cleaning I thought, "I know a lot of the young people in this area, what if it was someone I know, and they were mad about something we do here." This bothered me...I guess it might be because I started to think that people might not like programs I run here, scary how the mind works.

Blame the Church!

2007-07-30T10:15:00.000-07:00

This last week we were together with my family to celebrate my parents 40th Anniversary! It is amazing to see my parents marriage. We had a great time celebrating it and just being together. We don't get together often enough.

I was talking to my brother (another Pastor) about people who complain about church and all that goes on there. He said that it really frustrates him when Christians say things like, "I hate it that Christians are..." or "I hate it that the church is like this..." I was convicted by this. If you read some of my posts you will realize that I am one of those people. I like to complain about the Church and about Christians. However, I am a Christian, and I am a part of a Church...in fact a Pastor at one! I realized that I need to stop blaming and start taking responsibility, just like I said in my last post, "I am the Problem." Call me on it.

I am the Problem

2007-07-19T13:09:00.000-07:00

I was reading Blue Like Jazz by Donal Miller a while back, and something in this book has really stuck with me since then. I borrowed the book from someone, who had borrowed it from someone else, who got it from who knows where. But there on page 20 is a 4 word sentence that is highlighted (the only highlighting I saw in the book). The sentence says, "I am the problem." Everyone (including me) loves to blame someone else for their problems, and few people take responsibility for their actions and yet here in this book is the statement, "I am the problem." We create unions, so we can blame management, we are activists so we can blame other people for environmental, social and political problems. We fire people because we blame them for the organizations problems. We blame the government for everything. We love to blame.
However, it does no good for me to protest something or blame someone if I am doing nothing to make the situation better. Miller puts it this way: "...it did me no good to protest America's responsibility in global poverty when I wasn't even giving money to my church, which has a terrific homeless ministry." I think (like Miller) that instead of being activists we should all realize that "...true change, true life-giving, God-honoring change would have to start with the individual." We can't change the world before we change ourselves. So...instead of joining the activists in protesting global problems, I think we should all start by joining activists and their protests with our own sandwich board signs that read, "I AM THE PROBLEM." Let's see what happens.

Steroids - Should We Care?

2007-07-18T11:42:00.000-07:00

Because I follow a lot of sports, I hear a lot about steroids. I am always annoyed when Sports Illustrated fills it's magazine with personal info and dirt on the people involved in sports. I JUST WANT TO READ ABOUT SPORTS! Maybe I am insensitive but I really don't care who Derek Jeter is going out with or whether Cecil Fielder talks to his son.

Steroids is sort of like that but different...Sports Illustrated had an article entitled "Should We Care" about the whole steroids issue, I didn't read the article but I have often asked myself that question. Should we care if baseball players take drugs that eventually make them look like bobblehead dolls? Should we care if track athletes can no longer perform reproductive activities? Should we care if football players muscles are so big that they break their own bones? If these people want to do this to themselves then let them!

But then there's the Chris Benoit story...a pro wrestler who just murdered his family and commit suicide. It was just found out that testosterone levels in his body were 10 times that of the normal person. Is it possible that the steroids made him do it? Well he needs to take more responsibility then that, but it has been proven that steroids can change your moods and make you more aggressive. When this sort of stuff happens it makes me realize that steroids are not just something that harms the individual...then again most sins don't affect just the individual, right?

Where's Waldo?

2007-07-17T13:20:00.000-07:00

If you can find Waldo in this link you are amazing! Turn up the volume, there is some good music going on too.

"Christian" Music

2007-07-16T10:42:00.000-07:00

The whole idea of "Christian" music has bothered me lately. There is this whole industry that exists to produce and sell "Christian" music. It's as if the music itself could be Christian...I am pretty sure that music itself does not have a soul (well OK there is Soul music, but c'mon!). I prefer to think that music is just music, sometimes Christians play it, sing it or write it. What if Christians did not have the advantage of having Christian labels producing their music, or Christian radio stations playing their music and Christian book stores selling their music? I think it would be wonderful...I think there would be more "Christian" music on secular radio stations and in regular music stores. There would be Christian artists who are more prepared to be honest about their faith. There would be people outside the Christian circles who might be exposed to some good Christian artists (I think there are a couple of those!?). I think this would make a lot more sense.

I think that this whole situation is a symptom of a larger issue. Christians are so scared of becoming like the people "of the world" that they feel the need to separate themselves as much as possible. However, I believe Christians have a lot to offer the world and should therefore be entering into it as often as possible so that people can see what it is that Christians have to offer.

Fireworks

2007-07-13T22:21:00.001-07:00

We just got back from a week of holidays...a really great time. We went camping in Spruce Woods and then dropped our kids off at their grandparents for a couple days while Nicky and I got to visit the mall and hotel in Minot, ND. One of my favourite moments happened on our very first night. Carberry ( a small town near Spruce Woods) was celebrating it's 125th anniversary. They had a fireworks display and we decided to take them in. It was a normal fireworks show...actually quite good for a small town. Our kids loved them so much, but my favourite was the drive home. Ben kept telling us which were his favourite fireworks.
"My favourite was the one that looked like...[pause as he considers how to describe it]...a water fountain...exploding!"
"Actually my most favourite one was the one that looked like a squiggly spaceship from Mars, that one was really cool!"
"Wait, the best one was the green one, you know, the one that filled my whole window (we were watching from in our van)."

We had no idea which ones he was talking about, but I wish I could describe things like that!

Religion

2007-07-05T14:42:00.000-07:00

Had supper with our friends the other night, they are people that we have met because Ben is friends with their son at school. They are from Sri Lanka, later from Norway and moved to Canada a few years ago. They actually have family in Sri Lanka that was hit by the tsunami and many people they know were devastated by it.

As we were about to leave I had a real good discussion about faith with the father (good discussions usually happen when you are about to leave). We talked about religion in general and how God created us for peace and to care for one another, and almost all religious teaching is about peace and love...yet religion is often the cause of war. He is a very smart man and seems to have read up on everything. I really felt a good connection with him and a kinship in the way that he understands religion. They are a devout religious family who happen to worship at an Islamic temple. It's interesting though, I really feel as though we laid the groundwork to understand each other better and, I can't wait to discuss with him more about our faiths. I think we could really learn from each other.